overheard

Overheard in my bed this morning, as all three girls were having some mommy time.

For no known reason, this exchange occurs:

Miss Rose: Gracie, can you say"rectangular prism?"


Gracie: Can you smell my foot? (while sticking said foot in her sister's face)

It still makes me laugh out loud!  I love being a mom and I live for these moments.

Sometimes the funny exchanges have some sort of reasoning behind the content.  Not this one though.  Just pure kid exchange!

A little update on my current journey...

I've been enjoying me some yummy food.  For the most part I haven't over-indulged, but definately not refusing either.  My aim is for balance, not going without or going with too much.  For me, this is about a lifetime, not just a diet that will end.  I'm sure after Valentine's Day passes, I'll get back on track a bit more.  Or maybe not, as Bean's birthday is coming up as well.  Well, I'll have a few days with no excuses!

I have been able to get in some runs and workouts this week.  I could have used one or two more, but the few I got are better than none!  I've been trying to do some ab work and arm work on a daily basis.  I feel a bit sore in those areas, so I guess it's doing something.

I had one of my best runs in a long time today.  I have really been focusing on making myself run faster.  Running with the Nike+, on my known route is a big help.  I know generally where my mile markers are and the Nike+ will tell me at any time what pace I'm running.  For a few months now, I've been running sub-10 minute miles on my shorter runs. 

Today, my goal was a 45min run of all sub-10 minute miles.  It took me almost 2 miles to find my groove, which is longer than normal.  But I finally found it and just kept pushing myself.  The more I push myself, I find that my "set speed" is getting faster.  When I push, I can run at an 8:30min mile pace.

The verdict?  4.8 miles in 45 minutes.  Blew 10 minutes out of the water!!  If I remember correctly, that put my average pace around 9:25 per minute.  I'm really having to push, and a lot of the time I feel like a lumbering elephant, completely ungraceful. 

My new goal?  5 miles in 45 minutes.  That would be a flat 9 minute mile.  I think I can do it.

How to know when to take your child to the doctor

Disclaimer: I am not a medical professional.  Beyond some biology classes and an Emergency Medical Technition course, I have NO medical training.  I'm just a medical sponge and have a great pediatrician.

Growing up and even into college, I wanted to be a doctor or a nurse.  I've always been fascinated by medicine and I love researching and learning medical things.  As a mom, I've found it beneficial to learn and understand more about viruses, infections and antibiotics.

I don't like wasting money, and I really don't have any to waste.  Paying $15 per doctor appointment (and $50 for Urgent Care), I don't like to take my children in for every sniffle, cough or even vomiting episode.  At the same time, I don't want to be a negligent parent and allow an infection to worsen because I was hesitant to pay a co-pay.  I also don't like to over-medicate my children, and while antibiotics are necessary at times, there are negative attributes as well.

I have a great pediatrician who loves to explain things and even test me in my knowledge and understanding of my kids illnesses.  I'm not sure if he's like that with everyone, or if he senses that I'm a medical sponge.

Last month I was 2 for 2 in one week, taking my children in and leaving with a prescription for antibiotics, I've been patting myself on the back for making good use of my doctor and co-pay.  While mommy instinct does play a part, I think it's more due to the mental checklist I've created over the past few years.

Here's Beana's guide to diagnosing your children...It's pretty basic.

Fevers
Fevers are good and normal; they fight infection.  They are common at the beginning of a virus, and usually don't require medical intervention.  Liquids, cool baths, wet cloths all help with fever.  For high fevers, I usually give Tylenol or Ibprofren.  As amazing as it sounds, fevers as high as 104 are within the "normal" range for kids.  If my kids have a low fever (below 101) I usually let it ride and do it's job without medicating.

Usually fevers lasting more than 3 days can indicate some sort of infection that may need treatment.  A lot of it depends on the other symptoms.  Recently, with the swine flu and other flues that went around, fevers lasting a week were part of the usual run of the illness.  Two of my kids went through this.

From my experience, a fever is a real issue is when a child has been sick with a cold or respiratory flu for a few days or a week, and gets a fever all of the sudden.  According to my pediatrician, this almost always indicates a secondary infection.  Which is exactly what happened recently with Lily.  She had a cold for a week or more--runny nose, coughing.  But no fever.  When she suddenly became feverish, and it climbed to 102, I knew there was something more going on.  And sure enough--ear infection.

I've also learned, a fever combined with a sore throat and no other symptoms can be strep throat.  This is what recently occurred with Miss Rose.  She actually didn't complain as much as I would have expected for how bad her throat looked.

Runny Noses
The bane of all mother's existance.  We should seriously buy stock in Kleenex.  Runny noses run so rampant in the winter.  And they can last a few weeks.  We've found (and this is my ped's rule of thumb) when a runny nose lasts more than two weeks, it's often turned into an infection.  This is especially true when the mucous is thick and it's acompanied by a cough caused by post-nasal drip.  My pediatrician doesn't go as much by color of mucous as he does duration.

I've heard it estimated that in their first few winters, children pick up a few viruses a month.  This is how the body builds immunity.  Runny noses, which come with colds, can be the cause of infections that do need treatment.  But on it's own, a runny nose is just a runny nose.

Ear Infections
These aren't too hard to pinpoint.  In my children, the primary indicator is usually when they've had a cold and suddenly get a fever.  We seem to catch them before they get too painful.  So far, it's usually the fever that tips me off, not the child complaining of pain.  My chiropractor told me once that he never used antibiotics when his children had ear infections.  He liked letting the infection run it's course and only once did it result in a ruptured ear drum.  I did let an ear infection run it's course in Lily when she was a newborn.  I just wasn't ready to put antibiotics in her system.  And she recovered just fine.

Vomiting
For the first two years of her life, every time Gracie got a fever, regardless the cause, she would vomit.  Usually multiple times.  Her little system was just very sensitive and that was it's response.  Quite the opposite of Miss Rose who has vomited less than a handful of times in her six years.

Dehydration is the biggest concern with vomiting.  After many conversations with triage nurses late at night, I've learned some tricks.  For small toddlers and children, they usually recommend trying 1 teaspoon of Gatorade every 20-30 minutes if there is concern for dehydration.  Have you ever actually tasted pedialyte?  It's awful.  Definitely go with Gatorade!  I think the last time Gracie went through a vomiting stint, they wanted her to urinate at least once in several hours.  She got very close to going beyond the threshold, but finally urinated.

Another trick I learned (from a friend, and also recommended by the on-call nurse) is making rice water to soothe a tummy.  You boil rice in water--just like you were making some to eat--but before all the water cooks in, pour the water off the rice.  It should look slightly milky and be a little thickened.  It's full of soothing starch.  You can feed it directly to the child or mix it with another liquid or food.  This helps tremendously with settling their tummy and even stopping up loose stool.

Bland foods are obviously the foods of choice when recovering from a sick tummy. 

So...bottom line...my rules for doctor visits:

--fever+pain (sore throat, ears etc)
--fever that comes several days after the initial illness set in
--runny, thick congested nose lasting more than two weeks
--fever lasting more than three days

There are plenty of times I take my children in to the doctor and they don't need antibiotics or other treatment.  Sometimes as a mom, you just need that peace of mind.  And as Bean always says "that's why we have insurance."

What do you look for before you take your child to the doctor?   What was your "shining mom moment" when you hit the nail on the head with your child's sickness?  (just like I did last month--2x in one week!)

This has been a very sickly season for us and many of our friends and family.  I'm looking forward to warmer weather and less germs!
 

on my mind

I am so thrilled to NOT have to take Miss Rose to school in the morning.  Yay for Friday holidays.  I'm looking forward to a great long weekend full of friends and family time.

Am I the only woman who experiences "phantom pregnancies" on a regular basis?  There are absolutely no biological signs to indicate I am pregnant.  In fact, much the opposite.  But, after getting pregnant unexpectedly AND having one cycle at the beginning of said pregnancy (before I knew I was pregnant), my brain is always on overdrive.   Nausea, fatigue, bloating, frequent urination.  All freak me out.  I really hope the further away I get from having been pregnant, these phantom pregnancies will go away.   Because like clockwork, I have proof I'm not.  But there was that one time I was like clockwork...and I was pregnant...  That is what messes me up.

I'm thinking about declaring March a no-sugar month.  That may be the next step in my journey.  To avoid processed sugar.  There are no major holidays in March, and only one family birthday.  I think I might be able to handle it.  After trying some clothes on in Target tonight, I'm more motivated to get rid of this "baby belly" I have.

I want to find a half marathon to register for in May or June.  I need that challenge and motivation to keep running regularly.

Why have I not been successful in teaching my almost 3yr old to go to the bathroom on her own and wipe herself.  Every time I have to take her. Often she refuses to pull her own underpants down.  Since she wears a dress every day I have to tuck in her collar so it doesn't go into the toilet.  I don't remember a big ordeal teaching Miss Rose to use the bathroom independantly.  She's almost three, isn't it time?

After looking at some images online, I'm pretty sure Lily has a slight case of oral thrush.  My babies have never had that before.  Now I'm going to have to look up what to do about it.  I wonder what caused it.

When I am going to stop wanting another baby?  Is that just part of being a woman?  Within a few months, our baby-making days will be over, unless God drastically intervenes.  Which he can do.  Which is why I'm okay with this decision.  I know three children is good for us, our home, our life.  It makes sense to stop now.  I also know, that if for some reason God does desire us to have another child, he'll bring it about one way or another.  Many are the plans in a man's heart, but the Lord's purposes prevail.  I just want that desire to go away!  I'm happy and content and fulfilled with my family.  Yet I get newborn envy, and belly envy.

I still haven't started recording anything in Lily's baby book.  I really need to get on that.

It's past 11pm.  Why am I not tired?  Maybe it's the 3+ cups of coffee I had today.  Although the last one was 10 hours ago.

I need to try to go to sleep.

**an update**
I'm still not sleeping.  And forgot one other thing on my mind.

I really hope Lily decides to crawl or at least scoot in the next 2 weeks.  Her "1 yr" appointment is March 1.  But she'll really be 13 months.  As of now, she still doesn't crawl.  I honestly don't observe any reason for concern.  Her movement development is on track, just several months behind.  She scoots around a bit on her rear end now.  She tries to get moving with one leg behind her and almost rocking up onto the front leg.  Part of the problem is she still hates her belly.  I try to put her on it, but she just screams, until I pick her up or her highness decides to roll over.  The only cause for concern is that she isn't crawling.  Everything else about her seems normal.  I hope my gut instinct is correct.

on activity, exercise & fitness, part 2

When Miss Rose was around a year old, my sister started jogging at a nearby lake (not a true lake...man-made).  The paved path does not circle the entire lake, but you can do a total of 6+ miles if you go to the end and back.  My sister talked me into coming with her one afternoon.

At that point I had a great dislike of running.  I used to always say it was my least favorite form of exercise.  Rollerblading and the elliptical were my workouts of choice.  Running just wasn't smooth.  I had very curly hair in junior high and high school and guys used to love to tease me for how it bounced when I ran.

But I decided to give it a try, for my sister's sake.  I remember that first run well.  I told her I didn't know how far I'd make it before I had to start walking.  I would guess that we were jogging at a 11-12 minute pace, which is on the slower side.  I completely shocked myself, and was able to run an entire mile before I needed to walk.

It was exhilarating.  Much further and longer than I anticipated.  And it felt good.  It was challenging, and I like a challenge.  If I could do one mile, surely it wouldn't be hard to work up to two or three.  So I started running more, and so did Bean.  Often my mom would come with us and walk with Miss Rose in the stroller while we ran.  Then I got a jogging stroller.

And like that, an addict was born.  Running is now my happy place.  It's something I do just for me.  There is nothing like the achievement of running x miles in a day or a week or a month.  I am the only one who can run for me.  I also loved that it was an exercise I could do with my children. I didn't have to find childcare or pay for a gym membership.  In my city, we have running weather about 80% of the year.  A good double jogger was my most important purchase after the birth of Gracie.  (craigslist of course!)

Running helped me drop several more pounds below my pre-pregnancy weight with Miss Rose.  I ran my first half marathon.   I ran up until 32 weeks of pregnancy with Gracie.  Even with a c-section, I was back to walking at 4 weeks post-partum and starting jogging and walking by 6 wks post-partum.  Again, running helped me lose more weight than I gained.  I ran my second half marathon when Gracie was 6 months old.

I ran until 35 weeks with Lily (and delivered her at 37 weeks).  Starting up again, not so easy with three kids.  I had great intentions.  Miss Rose was in school 5 mornings a week.  We now lived in a neighborhood I could run in.  But finding the time, energy and motivation to run while raising three small children and working has been challenging. 

In the last year I've probably averaged 2 runs a week.  Which isn't terrible, but isn't great either.  I've found myself in cyles where I'm frustrated, and even slightly depressed at my lack of exercise, which instead of spurring me to make time to exercise, only makes me more lethargic.  It's a place I never imagined myself after 3 years of running through pregnancies and life.  (I did run another half marathon when Lily was 8 months old).

Bean understands my need to run and is very supportive.  He encourages me to get out and run.  I deal with guilt on workdays.  I want to be with the kids instead of run.  But there is no doubt that even 30 minutes of running benefits me which in turn benefits the kids, far more than a endorphin-deprived mom who spends 30 more minutes with them that day.

I also crave long runs (right now, long for me is more than 4 miles).  So if I only have 30 minutes to run, I'll skip it, because it doesn't meet my desire.  Now after a year of this up and down relationship with running, I'm starting to get back into a groove.  It's helped that Bean has been making running more of a priority himself.  So we encourage and support one another.  We figure out how to make sure each other gets runs in.

I've been pushing myself more, especially during those 30 minute runs.  I've been at a 10-10:30min pace for a few years now.  The last two months I've been pushing harder and I've finally broken that magical (for me) 10minute pace.  I can run 3 miles in less than 30min now.  In fact, on Sunday before the Super Bowl I ran 3 miles in 26:20 and continued on for a total of 3.45miles in 30min.  A new personal best for me.

It's been a journey, but a love of fitness has grown in me.  I feel better physically, I'm more self-confident when I'm running.  I sleep better and don't have as much stress and anxiety.  I still need to continue to make it a priority.

In some ways, exercise is the easy part.  That's probably why I don't gain weight, even with some of my poor eating habits.  For me though, that's not enough.  I want to be a fit person.  I want to have healthy eating habits.  I need the best of both worlds.

on activity, exercise & fitness, part 1

One of the reasons I wish I lived in the farm days (a la Little House on the Prairie or all the Amish novels I love to read) because their everyday lives required so much activity that they ate great food--lots of baked goods, fried food, multiple course meals.  I'm sure there were still weight issues, but for the most part I'd guess farming all day and keeping up with the house in the way they had to, they burned plenty o calories.

Unfortuately, my job is a desk job.  When I'm at home, the lure of the couch is great with the laptop in hand, TV in front of me.  I have a car to drive places, instead of walking.  I have machines and gadgets to complete household chores and tasks (although we DON'T have a dishwasher, unless you count the cute mexican man often found in my kitchen) that used to be done by hand.

Unless we eat like birds, or have speedy metabolism, getting daily activity is necessary to maintain weight and any level of fitness.  Daily life is not the same as it was on the farm.

As a kid, I was very active.  I spent a lot of time playing outside with my brother who was just 18 months younger than me.  I would make a deal with him that if we played dolls for a little bit, then I'd play outside with him.  Usually, he agreed.  We didn't have a TV until I was about 10.  The outdoors was our favorite place.

When I hit junior high and puberty hit me, things started to change a bit.  I still remember being pretty active, but in 8th grade my school schedule really jacked me up.  My "lunch" was before 11am.  So by the time I got home around 2 or 3, I was pretty famished and often ate a second lunch or large snack.  That is when I remember starting to look "fluffy" instead of slim.  That stuck with me for many years.  As I entered high school, my activity level did decrease.  I was interested in sports, but we didn't have the money for organized sports and I changed schools every few years so it was something I didn't really pursue. 

My junior year of college I took a P.E. course that started to change my body.  We met a few times a week and were required to exercise a few times in addition to our classes.  There was something about the instructor, the fact that it was all girls, and there were just a few of us, that I found myself enjoying exercise and pushing myself more than I had in the past.  That began my ongoing relationship with regular exercise.  I got healthier, and over the course of a few years, I think I dropped a size or two.  I didn't track my weight very regularly but I can look back at photos and see the change.

It also helped during my senior year of college when I lived in an apartment with a kitchen and no longer had to eat in the school cafeteria!  Unlimited ice cream, cereal and bagels are not good for the waistline. 

Exercise became a more regular part of my life.  I wasn't always consistent with it, based on my schedule and motivation level, but I knew the importance of it.  In my opinion, I have a body that responds very well to exercise.  In fact, unless I have large amounts of weight to lose (like after pregnancy) I almost need to exercise in addition to eating right to see change in my body.

Tomorrow...my current relationship with exercise.

on food, food and more food

So, I have issues with food.  Huge issues, perhaps not.  But issues nonetheless.  I love food.  I don't usually binge eat.  I just eat too many small amounts of food.  Yes, I'm one who goes back to the cupboard for another cookie, then another and a while later, another.  After I already ate two servings in the first place.

Food issues certainly seem to run in families.  At least they do in mine.  My mom struggled with her weight a lot of her life.  However, the older she got, the slimmer she got.  Now at almost 60, she's pretty slim.  We've thought that maybe hormones play a part in it.  My dad also struggled with weight from his 30's.  In fact, his struggle was a huge contributer to having a stroke at 47 and now being a hemi-plegic. 

Emotional eating is huge in my family.  So is late night eating.  I think late night was when my dad consumed most of his calories.  Eating for comfort, oh yes.  A rough day?  Kids misbehaving?  I just want sugar.  And carbs.  And Diet Coke.  No calories there, but not good for me nonetheless.

From puberty on, I wasn't fat, but I wasn't slim either.  I changed schools a lot, so I never got involved in sports.  I was plump I suppose.  I wasn't too self-conscious about it.  A few times I remember "dieting" and losing a few pounds, but nothing significant.  When I look back at photos of my high school and college years, I don't remember feeling as chubby as I looked. 

Over the past 10 years or so, I've learned a lot about my body and about eating.  It actually took having my first baby to lose a significant amount of weight (much of which I gained while pregnant!) and go below (*gasp, I'm going to say it) 150 and stay there.  Love Weight Watchers, the way.  I was not the norm, and I was at a personal low at the start of my next two pregnancies, gained less and less with each and lost it all plus a few. 

I'm very happy with what I've learned.  I'm proud of myself, because it's a lot of work.  I appreciate the encouragement when people comment that I don't look like I've had three children (um, if they saw my stomach--they'd know!).  I am confident I have the right tools to continue on this path and lead a healthy life.

But...I still have food issues.  I eat for comfort.  I like eating in the evening after dinner.  I go back again and again.  I am addicted to sugar.  And because of my family history, because I am raising three daughters, I need to continue my journey.  I am not pleased that I constantly go up and down 5 pounds.  And it's completely tied to my eating.  Because it usually happens within a few weeks, when I've been eating poorly and too much.

I've been at my pre-pregnancy weight with Lily, but I keep going back up a few.  And in fact, my goal has been to hit a bit lower than that weight.  Because I got pregnant when Gracie was just a year old, losing the additional weight was postponed.  I certainly don't want to be a twig, but I do want to be slim and toned.

I'm tired of fighting with food.  I'm tired of fighting with myself.  I want to win this battle once and for all.  I want to enjoy food for the nourishment it brings, and yes for the flavors and even the sugar rush.  But in a balanced manner.  It's so crucial to me to set a good example for my daughters.  Miss Rose loves sugar just like I do, and although proportional, she's always been big for her age.  I want to set her up well to have a healthy relationship with food.

When it comes to our outward appearance, one of the few things we have control of is our body.  (I do realize there are medical issues that sometimes take away this control.)  Every girl wants good self-esteem.  Yes, the inward is much more important than the outward.  But often the two are related.  That is a whole other subject though. 

I want to like myself.  To feel confident.  There are some things I can't control, like the size of my nose, the texture of my hair, the ways motherhood has affected those pregnancy and mothering parts of my body.  But I can control the shape of my muscles, my weight, and the tone of my body.  No, it's not about a number or a size.  But those are helpful measurements.

Do you get the feeling I'm working up to something?  You're right, I am.  I'm going to challenge myself to make some changes.  Do you need to do the same thing?  Perhaps we can do it together.  Or, I'm perfectly happy with you reading along as I journey. 

Tomorrow, my relationship with physical activity. 

almost home

I'm sitting in the Phoenix Sky Harbor airport, waiting to come home.  I've been at Tommy Barnett's Pastor's School.  Our group took a coach bus--but Bean agreed to letting me fly home as it will get me home 5-6 hours earlier than if I traveled on the bus. This pastor is committed to her call and her job (thus traveling without my family) but this mom is anxious to get home.  So anxious in fact, I failed to take into consideration the location of our hotel in respect to the airport, and the taxi ride cost just about as much as my ticket.  Live and learn. Hopefully Bean feels the same way after hearing the cost.

Pastor's School was a wonderful experience.  It's inspiring and challenging.  Probably one of the things I enjoyed the most was getting to be in a service, worship whole-heartedly, listen to an entire message, without needing to attend to a matter, check on something or be interrupted by a need.  Pastors rarely get to sit through entire church service!  God used Pastor's School to confirm things he's already been doing in me personally, as well as direction for my duties at church. 

This was a huge step for me.  Leaving my family.  Leaving my husband with three children to care for.  Leaving my BABY.  Figuring out bottles and breastmilk and pumping.  I never left Miss Rose or Gracie overnight until they were 18+ months.  But I did it.  I knew it was the right thing.  I knew we would make it.  And we did!!  My family did well without me, and I had a great experience.

I will say, being a working, traveling, still nursing mother brings new meaning to the word dedication!  It's not for the weak.  We spent 12+ hours at the conference site each day.  That was me, carrying around a purse and an extra bag holding my breastpump.  Since we were at a church, thankfully I found a nursing mothers room late the first day.  Keeping pumped milk cold, making sure I kept my supply up so I won't have trouble returning to nursing.  Although Lily has taken her bottles well, I'm hoping she'll be as happy to return to nursing as I will be.

That's not to mention the preparations before I left. 

While I was gone, Miss Rose participated in her first jogathon!  While running 19 laps, which Bean estimates to be close to 5 miles, she also lost her first tooth.  Lost it not only from her mouth, but in general.  She didn't notice at which point it came out.  How's that for a milestone! 

I'm almost home!