And....party of FIVE

Have you been wondering what happened to me???

This little one just doesn't keep to our family plans!

Baby's conception was a surprise!

At the first ultrasound we discovered the pregnancy was about 4 weeks further advanced than we had calculated.

C-section was scheduled 10 days before the due date.

But baby just couldn't wait!

Lily Cate arrived on January 28 at 3:15pm, born crying! She's healthy and perfect. 6lbs, 5oz and 19in long. My smallest baby by far!

Life has been quite a whirwind (especially for Bean) as SO much wasn't ready for this baby's arrival.

Lily and I arrived home tonight. Miss Rose and Gracie were really missing having Mommy at home, so I was thankful the doctor released me. Since it was my third c-section, I know the routine pretty well and can actually get more rest at home.

Sometime next week I will try to share the rest of the story. In the meantime I'll be resting and cuddling my baby girl and enjoying our family.

Never A Dull Moment Around Here

I've given up trying to plan and control life. At least for a few days! It kind of feels nice, especially since it means I am trusting in God more and my faith is increasing.

I woke up yesterday feeling pretty terrible and reminding myself--just two more weeks. I am a MUCH happier mom of a newborn than I am a 9-month pregnant lady. The sleep deprivation and craziness of three kids I can handle. My body not working, very difficult! Somehow I got us out of the house and got Miss Rose to school on time.

As the day wore on, I definately wasn't feeling better. By the time I was driving to get the kids I called Bean and said--I think it's time to go in and get checked. I'd started having more frequent and painful contractions. Better safe than sorry. Got my girls and took them to Grandma's house and Bean met me there.

When I got to the hospital I was having contractions 2-4min apart and at times lasting over a minute. I had dilated to a 2 (from 1 last week). The on-call doctor (who was consulting with the nurse over the phone) ended up having them give me 3 shots of terbutiline to relax my uterus and get the contractions to stop. Finally, it worked.

I'm not completely sure why the doctor was so determined to stop my labor as I am just a day away from 37 weeks. All I could really gather was that given my history, they felt better stopping my labor and having me figure out delivery with my own doctor.

So I'll be seeing my doctor as soon as they can get me in today. I am feeling like I am done with this pregnancy and my body is too--which it was trying to tell us last night! 37 weeks seems a bit late to be put on bedrest for just 10 days until my scheduled c-section. Plus my back gets SO painful after too much time in bed or even sitting that I would be absolutely miserable.

It may require testing the baby's lungs for maturity, but I'm hoping and praying that's what the doctor thinks is best. Or I just continue with life as usual and the next time the contractions start, it's an automatic c-section.

Tomorrow...I'll post a blog about Miss Gracie's birth...which will explain a lot of this!

Grounded

I've been grounded. Perhaps the doctor I saw yesterday was a bit over-reactive, but you gotta listen to the doc, you know?

I'm 36 wks pregnant now and at my appointment yesterday I was 1cm dilated and beginning to efface. Which really isn't that out of the ordinary, especially for a third pregnancy. But for some reason the doctor (one I haven't seen before) was very concerned that I won't even make it to my c-section date, which is 10 days before my due date even. For reasons I do plan to share in a later blog, actually going into labor is not the best thing for me or the baby.

So I'm under orders to rest a lot, no heavy lifting, no exercise etc. Which is JUST lovely to hear the weekend we are moving. No packing the boxes I've been needing to pack. No cleaning. UGH.

I'm sure some think this is like a dream--being TOLD not to do anything. But I am one who likes to stay active, to participate, and lets just face it, to be in control. And I can't do any of that.

Right now I'm sitting on the couch, stewing. Chomping at the bit to get some stuff done. Bean is at the new house finishing stuff up so we can move tomorrow night. If he comes home and I've done any work, I'm in BIG trouble.

We have great family and friends who are helping and will do whatever necessary to get us moved and settled. It's not a matter of things not getting done, it's just that I want to be able to do stuff.

But I'd definately prefer this baby wait a week or more before it makes an appearance. I still have a little baby shopping to do. Miss Rose turns 5 on Monday and is having a small pottery painting party with friends next Saturday. I don't want to miss that stuff!

Baby will come when baby will come though. It's all in God's hands. If baby needs to come earlier because it's better for one of us--then so be it!

In the meantime....I'm grounded.

I am SUPPOSED to get huge

People are delighting in telling me how big my belly is getting, how I've really popped or that I'm really looking like I'm going to have this baby soon.

These are people who see me on a regular basis.

Um, I'm about to be 36 weeks pregnant. I am SUPPOSED to look like I'm ready to have a baby, because I am. I'm not quite sure what they think I should look like or why they are acting so surprised. Haven't you seen a 9-month pregnant lady before?

I feel like I have this conversation about 10 times a week. Many are the same people who watched me go through my last pregnancy, so it's not like my pregnant bod is some surprise.

Honestly, I don't get it. Are they looking for something to conversate about? Am I like a train wreck that you just can't avoid staring at and commenting on?

I am not offended, truly I'm not. I realize my belly is pretty big. It means my baby is growing healthy and strong. I'm on the shorter side and I have good-sized babies, so my belly should be big. I don't mind people commenting on it. I simply don't quite get how they phrase their comments.

Yes people, I'm huge. It's okay. You can tell me that. Just quit acting like it's some shock or abnormality. I probably have a 7lb baby inside me right now, who will perhaps be close to 8lbs by the time he or she arrives.

I'm growing a baby, and I'm proud.

Pregnancy IS a workout

Last week after a 2.5 mile brisk walk my body felt as if I'd run 5 miles. And I know what it feels like to run 5 miles, because 4 miles was my standard run until I was around 6 months pregnant--and I would do 5-6 miles if I had extra time or was training for a race.

I was reminded how much work it is on a body to be pregnant. Especially 8 or 9 months pregnant. Not only am I carrying around extra weight, but it's concentrated in one area--throwing me off balance and making my muscles have to compensate.

Throw in the 5-yr old and 21-month old trainers that are always challenging my body, my pregnancy workout is ramped up even more. I don't need daily exercise, in fact I can't quite handle daily exercise, with the demands of life and children on my pregnant body.

I am still trying to get in 3 days of exercise a week. I do feel like my body is different with this pregnancy due to more exercise. I'm hoping it means it will bounce back a bit quicker than in the past. But I've offically retired the running shoes and am having to settle for a brisk walk.

As always, I try to find the good points in requiring a c-section--and one of them is that I won't be able to exercise for a few weeks. Hopefully I'll be able to do some walking after 3-4 weeks and then back to more exercise after 6 weeks. So I'm trying to keep it up until my c-section (which is in THREE weeks) and I'll enjoy the break as I recover and cuddle with my new baby.

Cyber-nesting

Nesting is almost like a God-given right for expectant mothers! This phenomena peaks its head out every once in while through the entire pregnancy (and I'm sure in the waiting period for adoptive moms) but really rears its head towards the end.

Every fiber of my being wants to nest and prepare for this baby. Since its our third time around, I realize that what you actually do need for the first several weeks isn't as much as one might think. Baby doesn't need a complete nursery or even wardrobe. Baby needs a place to sleep (which can also be your bed!), some onsies to wear and blankets to keep warm. Of course things like swings and bouncers make life a bit easier.

Moving just weeks before birth doesn't really compliment this nesting instinct. Especially moving two weeks before the impending delivery! I can't nest in much of a physical sense. I've made a few purchases here and there, usually when I find a deal I can't pass up. (like a $20 My Breast Friend nursing pillow from the closing store at www.babycenter.com) But for the most part, I've had to wait and to resist. It's pointless to stock up on basics, even diapers, when they are just going to have to be moved.

Thing is, not only do I want to nest for the baby, but I want to nest for our entire new house. Since the girls will be sharing a room for the first time, and have "new" bunkbeds--I want new bedding for them. We may need to purchase another dresser. We may need more toy storage and organization. We may need some end tables for the living room since we've been using a coffee table in a corner as an end table and a kids table at another end to hold our lamps (which don't have functioning switches and require plugging/unplugging for the desired function).

Bean has been laughing at me because I spend time almost every evening "cyber nesting." I'm browsing Babies r Us and Target online for random baby stuff. I'm checking out clothing at Gap and Gymboree. I'm trying to find a steal on Pottery Barn quilts on ebay. (For the record though, he has spent his share of time researching some appliances we need).

Cyber-nesting isn't all that bad. In fact, I would guess that I'm spending LESS money than I would if we weren't moving. Partially because there are things I just haven't purchased yet, and also because I am haunting ebay and other sites for the best deals. I got a changing pad cover on ebay tonight for $7 (including shipping) that was probably $20 new. Somehow I also purchased a new pair of shoes for myself. Not sure how that benefits the baby, but it was a deal I couldn't pass up!!

It will be fun to go out and get the little things the week before the baby is born. I guess it gives me something to look forward to. And hopefully I'll find the perfect bedding for the girls' new room--I just can't decide! I keep saying in some ways, it's good I don't know the baby's gender because I would probably even want to do more in preparation for the baby.

I've yet to find the perfect "take home" outfits though. I like to buy a special outfit for both genders and then return whatever I don't need. For some reason the "take home" outfit has been really important to me for each child. I'm on the hunt.

Off for more cyber-nesting!

The Latest

Here's what's going on lately...

Miss Rose started school today! She did fabulous. She's in a 5-day program called Early Admit Kindergarten (EAK) that meets each morning from 8-11:20. Yesterday we went to an orientation where she played outside while the teacher met with the parents. It was a great introduction to the facility and children for her. I was a bit concerned because she recently bragged about crying for a year and a half each time I dropped her at daycare. But no tears this morning! And she was so excited when I picked her up. It's going to be wonderful for her.


On our back patio...

She specifically wanted to wear her "High School Musical" shirt. What's amusing is that she has seen the movie maybe one time and it only holds novelty because her cousin is super into the movie and talks about it all the time. This shirt was a hand me down from a friend, but Miss Rose got all excited about it.


Getting ready to go into class

Our move has been postponed by a week in order to be able to complete the wood floors. In the long run, it won't matter too much. But right now it just feels like we are living in limbo. Much of the house is packed and there are boxes everywhere. I'm not motivated to clean or organize anything because I know eventually it ALL will be moved.

Did I share that I found GREAT bunkbeds on craigslist? I cannot wait to see them set up in the girls' room.

I am just about 35 weeks pregnant and feeling it!! This baby is so out in front that many of my shirts are about to be too short...they aren't going to cover the bottom of my belly soon. I see my doctor tomorrow and maybe I'll get an official c-section date. We shall see! We've had our boy name picked out for a while now and I think we're pretty sure about a girl name. But...you'll have to wait to find out the names!! It feels good to have some solid options that I like though. It's taken so long the third time around.

Gracie seems to sense the impending change. She is quite attached to mama these days and just loves to climb all over me and be held. It's probably going to be a good thing that Miss Rose is in school in the mornings because while I'm on maternity leave because while the baby is sleeping, I'll be able to have some one on one time with Gracie.

So, that's the latest!!

Pregnant Day

I am having a "pregnant day" today. What exactly does that mean?

It means I'm hormonal...i.e. grumpy and emotional.

I am impatient. Which makes me feel like a terrible mom.

My hormones are making my anxiety about various things in life more intense than necessary.

I am feeling FAT. My maternity clothes aren't fitting as well anymore.

I get grumpy when I can't exercise regularly...and my exercise lately has not worked up the sweat I need to make me happy.

I am unmotivated. Which makes me mad because I have so many things that need to be done.

When the baby has been moving today it's causing me pain. I guess it's how I'm carrying this baby because I've never experienced this before. The kid jabs and pokes me and makes me catch my breathe. Ouch!

I think I have just over 5 weeks left before my c-section. Of course to add to my pregnant day, I saw the nurse practitioner yesterday at my appointment, not the doctor, so I STILL don't have an official date. I go in again on the 14th so I hope I'll get my official date and time then. I should just relax about it. But I'm such a planner that it drives me crazy to not know yet.

I am trying to remind myself that this is the last time I will feel this way. That there are so many women who would give anything to experience a "pregnant day.' That this too shall pass.

But in the meantime, I'm going to continue my pregnant day.

Barely Breathing

I miss the olden days. Not that I lived in them, but there are things about them that I really would have liked. [Sidenote: It amuses me that Miss Rose has picked up this phrase and uses it to refer to things when she was 2 or 3.] For one, I think motor transportation is highly overrated. I'd be much happier plodding along with my horse, worrying only about the upkeep of my carriage and feeding the horses hay and water. There wouldn't be traffic to deal with or road rage. No car payments or outrageous gas bills (although I'm so thankful our gas bill has dropped almost 50% since this summer!)

What I really would like to take advantage of is the time of confinement a woman entered in her third trimester. It was somewhat of a social faux paux to be waddling around in the advanced stages of pregnancy, so women generally kept to their homes and even their beds. I realize this happened more in the upper eschalons, not on the farm. But while we are fantasizing, let's just go with it!

I'm sure you can guess where this is heading. I'm entering my third trimester this week and my life is anything but slowing down. In fact, it's gaining speed. I am a pretty hearty pregnant lady so I handle it all pretty well. But there are moments where it sure would be nice to sit on the couch, watch old movies and eat bon-bons while rubbing my ever-expanding belly.

Holiday seasons are always busy in church life. There will be a bit of downtime, but there is a lot of preparation that comes before it. Early deadlines, coordination of special services, making sure all the proper information is available, and the list goes on. So work is not slowing down!

And, it's looking like we are buying a house. I don't want to count my chickens before they hatch and we still need to make sure the home passes inspection...but, we put in an offer and it was accepted. It's exciting and scary at the same time. The main motivator in all this is providing a place for my parents to live affordably and near-by family. My dad is disabled and they are on a very fixed income and although my dad has learned to be pretty self-sufficient, there is a great value to emotional support for them. Our families actually lived together for about three years until about a year ago. We will be pooling resources to buy this home and convert the garage and a family room into a complete granny flat for them.

By the end of the month we will have made our final decisions about the house--which I suspect will be favorable and it will be time to start packing. And once escrow closes at the end of December we will be on a fasttrack to get the house ready for us to move in ASAP so that we have at least a few weeks to settle in before the baby comes. It's going to be very hard for me to be limited in what I can do to fix up the house and paint. Poor Bean is probably going to have to hog-tie me in order to keep me from attempting to move things that I shouldn't. We are blessed to have great family and friends who are supportive and already offering their help.

In the midst of this, I still want it to be a special Christmas. Gracie may not remember this Christmas once it passes, but she's old enough now to be excited about the experiences. Of course Miss Rose can't wait for Christmas to come. And she turns 5 at the end of January, which I want to be special for her as well. I'm a bit nostalgic about this being our last Christmas as a family of 4. I can't wait for the new baby to join our family, but I really want to enjoy this time with the girls before the dynamic changes.

Oh, and I have about three weeks left of the two classes I've been taking.

As I run around like crazy this week, with a full to-do list at work, bringing paperwork to the mortgage broker, planning baby appointments, thinking about Thanksgiving and Christmas shopping...I feel like I'm barely breathing. I want to be confined!

But I am so grateful that everything going on is GOOD and of GOD! Good busy I can handle. Tragedy and difficulties would be much more challenging.

It's a special time in life for so many reasons and although there are days I feel like I'm barely breathing, there are days that I make breathing room for myself. And Bean is always so good about making sure I have that also. Time marches on. This baby will come. Life will be full. And I am loving and cherishing every minute of it.

Fitness Friday on Monday & Family Picture Day

I can't seem to blog my Fitness Friday on Fridays! Oh well. That's the life of a mom. I made a discovery this week. One I'm not so happy about, but I knew was coming. But there is a new development that I am pleased about.

I think my days of running with the jogging stroller with both kids in it have come to an end. At least running more than a few miles. Miss Rose is probably a few pounds over the weight limit for the stroller. The poor thing has to practically fold herself into the seat as it is, although she never complains.

Prior to Friday, I ran twice without the jogger and had really great runs--10 minute miles for 3-4 miles. A little bit of back pain later, but nothing significant. Friday I ran 3.5 miles and walked .5 miles in the middle with the jogger and I was in so much pain the rest of the day, and it's lingered through the weekend. The positioning and strain on my back pushing the heavy jogger is too much for my pregnant state. If weren't preggo, I don't think it would be an issue...but I am, so it is!

As much as I want to fight it, I know I just have a few months left and need accept this limitation. I can walk with it of course and I'll probably experiment with running 2 miles in addition to walking 1-2 and see how I fare. And I'll be looking for every opportunity to run on my own!

The positive development is that Bean took Miss Rose's training wheels off her bike and she is riding on her own for short times! In just a week she had mastered the balance. She's still a bit wobbly and hasn't learned all the techniques of stopping and starting on her own or managing hills. But she's well on her way! I am confident that by the time I'll need to head to the lake with three children, she'll be able to ride along side us.

Speaking of jogging strollers...look what mine did to Gracie's face.



As every one-and-a-half year old does, she fell forward while walking and the stroller happened to be what broke her fall. Had it not been there, she may have skinned her knee or simply shed a few tears.

Instead, her head hit the end of it--causing a large goose egg and bruise; under her eye and her nose hit the wheel mechanism. When she's in a lot of pain she stiffens her whole body while wailing. I felt so bad for her.

Of course, this happened the day before Family Picture Day with Bean's mom for Christmas. I sent Bean a picture on my phone and he said as soon as he saw a picture coming through, he knew one of the girls had some sort of facial injury. Although usully it's Miss Rose who these things happen to.

I don't think the injuries ended up looking too bad in the photos. Thankfully it wasn't individual portraits of her. But we'll always remember the Christmas when Gracie fell into the jogger. Last year was the Christmas when Bean gave Miss Rose gum prior to the photos and it's showing in her mouth in the portrait where everyone else looked best! Who knows what next year will be. When we get the photos, I'll share them with you!

A camel, a water buffalo and a race horse

You're wondering what those animals have in common, right?? No, it's not a punchline to a joke.

The commonality here is ME!

I think I'm part CAMEL with how much water I've been drinking. It's like I'm going on a long journey through the dessert and feeling the need to conserve.

I've been SO thirsty lately. If there is one thing I do crave in pregnancy it's water. I'm a water drinker to begin with, usually try to get 64oz per day. But while pregnant, I could honestly drink probably twice that much and often do exceed 64oz in a day.

But, I'm not a camel who so gracefully stores water in its humps. However I do have a few humps I wouldn't mind strategically placing some extra liquid in. (if this blog had a soundtrack, Fergie would be singing about lovely lady lumps right now)

I'm more like a WATER BUFFALO. At least that's how I'm looking and feeling. Large, cumbersome and slow moving.

Ah, now you're getting it. The RACE HORSE bit.

Yup...I pee like a stinking race horse. All the time. I wish I wasn't so thirsty, because then I wouldn't have to pee so much.

It's the worst late in the evening, which of course is close to bedtime. And even when I'm getting ready for bed I just want to drink and drink.

I get up at least once before I fall asleep to pee, maybe twice. Definately wake up at least once a night. Which is just a huge annoyance. Waking to feed a baby I can handle...waking to pee just makes me mad!

But, knowing that probably barring a major act of God, this is my last pregnancy, I am trying to remember to savor every moment. Maybe not every time I have to pee. I cherish the reason behind it though. You are so moved by my sentimentalism right now, I can tell.

Even being as thirsty as a camel, feeling like a water buffalo and peeing like a racehorse, I relish the little one growing inside me causing this mess.

Now, if you'll excuse me. I'm thirsty.

My New Hero

My new hero is my chiropractor. You may nor may not have noticed, but I haven't been mentioning my headaches lately. I think I did share several weeks ago that I was going to be trying a chiropractor for the first time in my life. For some reason with this pregnancy, the headaches were very intense and tylenol offered little relief.

I had 4 adjustments in 5 weeks. After my first two visits, I had a bad headache the next day, but then some relief after that. After the 3rd visit, there was drastic improvement. I have taken tylenol maybe 2x a week for the past few weeks--and that was more to guard off a developing headache--and it worked! It's been a few weeks since I've had an intense headache.

My energy level has increased and I've needed less naps. While it could be related to being mid-point in my 2nd trimester, I really think it has to do with my headaches--or lack thereof. I wasn't sleeping well due to my headaches and they were just exhausting.

I am SO thankful that I finally had the courage (and spent the $$) to try the chiropractor. He will be my lifelong friend. I'm hoping that even after the baby is born, my headaches won't come back and if they do, that he will be able to help me.

At my first visit, during the evaluation portion, there was a look of shock on his face when I told him how much pain medication I took while not pregnant and the severity and frequency of the headaches I had just learned to function with. Maybe I should have tried this a long time ago...

I've heard of taking infants and children to the chiropractor, but I was interested to read about a personal experience in my friend's blog. If my baby has similar issues that Gracie did her first few months, we will be making a visit to my new hero!

Sweetest Baby Face

My belly continues to grow and I have quite the active baby. I'm already able to feel kicks and movement on the outside of my belly--several weeks earlier than in my pregnancies with the girls. I'm not sure what that means, if anything...but it is fun to feel. I want to relish every moment of this pregnancy, as it's most likely my last.

Here's a few photos from my recent ultrasound.

Baby #3's profile (20wks)

Baby #3 Thumb sucking!

And for fun comparison...

Gracie's profile...she still has those chubby cheeks! (20wks)

Miss Rose's profile (around 30 wks)

I definately see similarities in all three profiles--but differences too. It somewhat makes me think that #3 is a girl too, given the resemblances there, but you never know!!

What do you think??

Stayed Strong!!!

I had my 20-week ultrasound today. Although I've been pretty determined to not find out the gender, for some reason this week I was feeling weak. Curiosity was getting me. Since this is the last baby, I am pretty anxious to know if a third girl will join or family (most likely) or if will be a litle boy (I would be shocked!).

My co-worker who's due just a few weeks after me will probably be finding out the gender of her first baby this week or next week. Most people around me are annoyed that I don't want to find out! Hence my weakening. Bean would prefer to know, but he is giving in to my whim. Plus, we're having such difficulty coming up with any names, knowing the gender would make it easier to focus.

But I would like to announce....I stayed strong and didn't find out! I told the tech early on I didn't want to know and she said "well, we'll just not even look in that area." What a sweetheart! Of course measuring the leg bone is part of the procedure and for all I know, parts could have been visible but I'm not trained to read an ultrasound, so I have no idea if I saw any parts--or lack there of. All I was able to distinguish was the leg bone.


I feel very satisfied in not knowing. For me, the surprise really is worth it. Like I did for Gracie, I will have a coming home outfit for either gender that a family member will wash once the baby is born--and the other I will return.


The baby was quite active and just very busy. Sucking his/her thumb or hand at one point, moving, kicking etc. The baby measured dead on for my due date (which made me happy since the first ultrasound showed such a different date than what I expected). Since I'll be having a c-section, it's comforting to know that the baby will be ready. I definately see some similarities in how the girls looked in their ultrasounds--shape of the face, nose, head etc. But some differences too.

So, we'll know in about 18 weeks if this baby is a boy or a girl! I'm keeping you in suspense with me. I should be able to scan the photos next week and share them with you.

Halfway There!

Amazingly, I've already reached the halfway point in my pregnancy. It sure has gone fast! I guess it helps that I didn't even know I was pregnant until about 9 weeks in. I highly recommend that course of action.

Actually, if you go by when I will deliver, I'm more than halfway through. I had a doctor appointment today and found out that as long as my pregnancy progresses normally--which it should--I will have my c-section around February 7 or 8, at 38.5 weeks. It's kind of scary and kind of exciting to have a general idea.

While I would MUCH prefer a natural delivery, since it's no longer an option for me, I look on the bright side and enjoy that I'll get to plan everything around when this baby will come---the time that Bean takes off work, my last day of work, who will help with the kids...and the list goes on.

The baby has started to move a bit more. At least once a day I feel the little "pokes" of his/her feet from the inside. I can't wait until it's strong enough to feel the kicks on the outside of my belly. I have my level two ultrasound on Wednesday and it will be fun to see the baby's development since the last ultrasound, about 6 weeks ago.

I do hope the time will continue to fly by!

Already??

When I was pregnant with my first baby, I got to the end of my pregnancy and thought I was so lucky to have no stretch marks. My belly was huge--but no marks or even linea negra. Unfortunately it didn't last. I got home from the hospital and my belly was slack and not so big--and what do you know, stretch marks all along the bottom! I think my skin had been so stretched (8lb + baby) they weren't visible and they also were probably on the underside of my huge belly.

I pretty much knew they'd come back with Gracie. They faded by the time Miss Rose was 18 months old or so and were barely visible. Of course they did return. But this summer they were pretty faded already.

Now I am 19 weeks pregnant, and those nasty things have made an early appearance. Probably due to the fact that it's #3 and there was only 13 months between delivery and this baby's conception. Oh well. I do know they will fade again (they better) and in the meantime, perhaps I'll avoid the mirror!

I will tell you that going to Sea World is good for the frumpy-feeling pregnant lady. There are women in all stages of pregnancy and post-partum. I was comforted to see some ladies who were probably at similar stages of pregnacy with the belly just popping out, but not looking so firm and round yet. I'm not the only one!

This was a very full week again, and I'm very glad to be at the end of it! I've had a nice day with the girls so far, doing some housework and then going to Sea World for a few hours. I love my Fridays at home! Tomorrow will be nice because Bean will be with us all day and we don't have much going on.

I can't wait for next weekend because I'm going to our Women's Retreat and also doing some Fall shopping for the girls and maternity shopping for me. Now if only Fall would come to Southern California so we can use our Fall clothes.

18 weeks on the 18th

I thought it was kind of random that I'm 18 weeks pregnant today and it's the 18th of the month. For the most part I'm feeling well. The sickness is gone, which is a huge blessing. I'm more tired than I'd like to be, given that I'm supposed to have the 2nd trimester energy. Maybe it's related to having two children already. I am napping more than I thought I would be at this point. Oh well! I'm really struggling with daily headaches. Headaches have been a part of my life for oh, 31 years! Usually I can medicate my way through them, but not while pregnant. Tylenol just doesn't do much. I visited a chiropractor for the first time ever yesterday and am hoping after a few visits to feel some progress.

I am just a few weeks away from being in full-time maternity clothes. I could be now...but they still look a little funny on me. I had to go out on my lunch yesterday and buy some maternity pants though, because I was dying in my unbuttoned, but still too-tight pants at work. I got some good deals on the clearance rack at Target--3 shirts, 1 pair of capri's and two non-maternity but stretchy waist skirts for $65. At least once a day I look down and my first thought is, "why do I have a gut? Oh yeah, I'm pregnant!"

These next few months are going to fly by and there just isn't a lot of blogging time. But, I am going to try to keep up as best I can. I am taking two classes this semester and spend all of Tuesday and Thursday evenings in class. It's worth it...but it's hard work balancing it all.

Miss Rose started soccer and had her first game last week. It was so much fun. She's on the same team as her cousin and the majority of both family members were there to cheer them on. Miss Rose scored 2 goals and her cousin scored 1. We were very proud. Bean was thrilled. I think he heard him make some remark about "the next Pele." Silly man. Even though we don't (and may not) have boys, I'm glad he can get excited about his daughters playing sports.

Hopefully I'll get the time to share some soccer pictures with you this weekend.

I guess I have to believe it...

Some days, well most days, I still have a hard time believing I am pregnant. Since I planned and anticpated my other pregnancies for months ahead of time, I was ready for every milestone, every moment of early pregnancy. I probably bordered a bit on obsession!

Miss Rose was my first pregnancy, one I had waited for my entire life. I was so thrilled to be pregnant. I worked only part-time and was also getting my master's degree. I had plenty of time and energy to focus on my pregnancy and my changing body.

By the time I got pregnant with Gracie, I was very excited to be having another baby, to not just be a mom of one, but of two. Miss Rose was 2.5 by then and not so much of a "baby."

This pregnancy came as such a surprise...although a wanted one. First I waited over a week to even take a test. Then I find out I'm even 4 more weeks along. It was just shock after shock!

I'm sure the busyness of my life plays a big role. I don't have much time to dwell on my pregnancy between working almost full time, still having a baby and the variety of other things in life. I'll be walking along and all of the sudden think--I have a baby, a real life baby growing in me.

My body is making it quite clear that I am pregnant and that I'm truly further along. This week my belly really has started to pop out. All of the sudden some of my clothes don't fit at all or they are getting tight in the waist. I am 15 weeks now with my third child, so it is par for the course. Somehow a 3-pound weight gain on the scale feels like a 10-pound gain in my clothes!

I am anticipating the next few weeks when I'll begin to feel the baby daily. Sometimes I think I am feeling some early flutters--when I am still and relaxed and not paying attention to anything else. I know that it will increase.

So I am embracing the reality of this pregnancy. I truly am thrilled and can't wait to hold the little one and even to nurse again. I can't wait to see God's plan unfold for this little one he has given us.

Naps are my Nemesis

I have two nap issues to share with you today.

Miss Rose is 4.5 and has been a pretty great sleeper most of her life. We had a few weeks of crying around 6 months as she learned to put herself to sleep and to sleep through the night. (Thankfully I learned my lesson and taught Maleah to self-soothe much earlier so we didn't have to go through that again). Miss Rose thrives on routine and so was always glad to go down for her naps. Around 18 months I converted her to 1 afternoon nap--which for a long time was 3 and sometimes even 4 hours. Oh such glorious hours for a mom!

I realize I am lucky that at 4.5 she will still gladly take a 2 hr nap. But it's starting to cause problems at night. Bedtime is around 8pm, which both mama and dad rely upon! We'd both much rather have kids who are in bed early and have those last few evening hours to ourselves, then have them sleep in late. However, some nights this summer Miss Rose has been up until 9:30 or 10pm. She'll play around in her room some, come out and ask us things about 10 times until we finally law down the law. I know it means naptime needs to come to an end.

But the transition is NOT an easy one for her. She may make it okay through naptime playing and having quiet time, but the evening almost always brings very bad behavior. Tonight she basically yelled at me at a church event (chastised may be a better word), in front of other adults. Not acceptable. I know the lack of a nap is part of it--but we teach her that no matter how she feels, she still has to behave.

Some days she still takes naps, especially if it's been a big morning, but I try to keep those shorter. I know she will adjust, but for my routine oriented girl, it's not easy. We have a year until Kindergarten, so hopefully by then it will be all worked out.

The other nap issue is my own! With this pregnancy, and the current heat especially, I am just exhausted in the afternoons. Some days I literally cannot keep my eyes open. When I'm at work, I have to--but days I am at home, it's a struggle. Mostly the nap wins!

I've shared before how insomnia is an issue for me. These naps don't help. Take yesterday for instance. I spent much of the morning doing housework and laundry then we had a family outing. It was fun--but by the time we got home and got the kids down, it was lights out for me. I slept probably 1.5 hrs. And in spite of the two tylenol PM I took around 10:30, I did not fall asleep until almost 2am. That's a bit worse than normal, but it's common.

It's a vicious cycle. Because then I wake up tired. I'm trying to avoid caffeine, so I can't rely on that to keep my awake. Come afternoon--I need another nap!

Somehow today I managed to avoid taking a nap, in spite of the 2am incident. That should mean I'll easily fall asleep tonight and perhaps not need a nap tomorrow. I'd rather get my sleep at night. I'm waiting for more of the infamous "2nd trimester" energy to come my way. I know come the 3rd trimester, I'll probably need more naps again.

So, avoiding our home right now is a good idea. We have a grumpy, tired pregnant mama, and a grumpy tired napless 4.5 yr old. Oh the joys!!

What God wants, God gets

I have an infinate amount of faith and trust in God. I've had the privilege of serving him my entire life. With all the twists and turns my life has taken, looking back I see God's hand in everything--even the most difficult or painful experiences.

However, that doesn't change the fact that I am a planner and am a bit of a control freak is some areas of my life. I certainly am not a Type A personality across the board--but I like to have a plan and I like it when things go according to plan. Of course there are areas I wish I was more more Type A (like cleaning and actual organization of my home).

So while I trust God--I still like to have a plan! And, most of my life has gone according to the plans I've laid out--in regards to jobs, schooling, children etc. I've always seen it as confirmation that my will and God's will are mostly in sync. Sure details often change, but the grand scope seems to work out.

One area that I'm a big control freak in is procreation or it's prevention! I learned how to track my cycle which is necessary for the form of birth control I use. I've been successful in this for a long time. Between the two girls and then the last several months.

Remember this post about the magic number of children that seems to exist for each individual/family? I guess I have confirmation that God agreed with my stance on it...but things aren't exactly according to the plan I had.

You've probably figured it out...I'm pregnant. A desired, but not a planned pregnancy! I was thinking we'd get pregnant sometime next year--but I guess God had other plans.

With all my planning and tracking, things somehow went awry! Not only did I get pregnant in spite of prevention, but I found out yesterday I am 4 weeks further along than I calculated. I went from 10 weeks to 14 weeks. Yikes!!

I can't decide if I have more shock about being pregnant to begin with or at being further along. I have known for several weeks now--from when I thought I was 5 weeks, but I was really 9. There's some "female facts" I'll spare you from in this forum. I honestly have no idea how this all is happening--except to say--God gets what he wants. God wanted us to have a baby this coming February and in spite of my planning and prevention--he made sure it happened.

I am thrilled to be having a third baby. It's kind of hard to comprehend at times since Gracie still feels like such a baby to me. But I guess at that point she'll be almost 2 and hopefully will seem older. We just told Miss Rose yesterday and she is excited. Her teacher said she talked about it all day at school today.

The timing will be interested. Baby will come probably days or a week after Miss Rose's birthday and just before Bean's birthday. I had hoped to have an "end of the year " baby to avoid sandwiching another birthday in the first half of the year. Since my church is without a senior pastor, the future of my job could be in question when one is hired. But--if God wanted this baby to come now--he must have a plan for everything else!

So, that hopefully explains a bit about why I haven't written much lately. Much of what's been in my head has been related to the pregnancy and I wanted to wait to share until after I'd seen a healthy baby on the ultrasound. Now I'll probably have SO much to say!

Remember, what God wants...God gets. You can plan all you want, but in the end it does come down to faith and trust.