OBOB
9 years ago
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Sunday, September 19, 2010
already behind
I am trying SO.HARD to find joy in the journey. That's been my inner mantra this past week. I'm having a few weeks (and probably a few yet to come) where I feel behind before I've even started. I'm getting what I need done, but at the cost of a bit of my sanity. It's the homefront, the workfront, the lifefront. It's just full.
Joy in the journey. So many around me are experiencing great heartbreak. A 4-month old baby recently diagnosed with a brain disorder. Much is yet unknown about her prognosis, but it seems without a miracle, her development will be severely impaired. A 36-year old mom of three, with aggressive breast cancer looking at at least one year of intense treatment.
May day to day struggles pale in comparison to these journeys.
Yet I struggle. I want to focus on the positives. I want to recognize the blessings. I want to look at the big picture. And I do. I do all of these things. Yet still I feel weighed down. Overwhelmed. Stuck. Bleak.
I trust. I trust in my Lord. I trust in His plan. I trust in His Word.
I say, why so downcast O my soul. Put your trust in the Lord. Hide me in the shadow of your wings. (Psalm 17:8, Psalm 43:5)
One day at a time. One task at a time. One moment at a time when necessary.
I soak in the affection of my daughters. I bask in the love my of my husband. I drown in the grace of my Savior.
I may already be behind this week, but I'm going to try again. To seek after hope. To find joy in the journey.
Joy in the journey. So many around me are experiencing great heartbreak. A 4-month old baby recently diagnosed with a brain disorder. Much is yet unknown about her prognosis, but it seems without a miracle, her development will be severely impaired. A 36-year old mom of three, with aggressive breast cancer looking at at least one year of intense treatment.
May day to day struggles pale in comparison to these journeys.
Yet I struggle. I want to focus on the positives. I want to recognize the blessings. I want to look at the big picture. And I do. I do all of these things. Yet still I feel weighed down. Overwhelmed. Stuck. Bleak.
I trust. I trust in my Lord. I trust in His plan. I trust in His Word.
I say, why so downcast O my soul. Put your trust in the Lord. Hide me in the shadow of your wings. (Psalm 17:8, Psalm 43:5)
One day at a time. One task at a time. One moment at a time when necessary.
I soak in the affection of my daughters. I bask in the love my of my husband. I drown in the grace of my Savior.
I may already be behind this week, but I'm going to try again. To seek after hope. To find joy in the journey.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
running through my head
In light of all the running I'm doing these days, I thought that was a pretty catchy title for a "stream of consciousness" blog!
Speaking of running, that's pretty much what I've been doing all day. We fell way behind in housework this week. I say "we" because Bean is a huge contributor to household work. In fact, further solidifying his nomination for husband of the year, twice this week I have gone for a run when Bean got home from work, while he started dinner. I tell ya, he rocks. I'm on par for 19 miles this week, just 1 mile shy of this week's training schedule.
I really thought as Lily got older, the whole working mom with young kids thing would get easier. It's not. Now I have a baby becoming a toddler who has a lot of opinions and can express her needs and loudly if necessary. And a feisty 3yr old. And an intense 6yr old. It may be different than having a baby, but it's definitely not easier. I'm still coming to terms with this.
I'm proud of all I got accomplished today. When I've just busted my tail at work for 4 days, it can be hard to do the same at home. But it's gotta be done. I got sheets changed on all the beds and have done boatloads of laundry and sorted a lot of clothes. Getting out the fall stuff, even though it's still warm. Usually we don't need our warmer clothes until late October or November.
Bean went to Open House at Miss Rose's school tonight. I guess she cried for quite a while on the first day of school. We knew she was crying when we left (same as last year) but staying longer would have only made it worse. I guess I'm glad I'm just now finding out that it lasted a while. She only cried that first day. In reviewing some classwork sent home, Miss Rose had to draw and label her favorite foods. They were: donuts, mac&cheese, ice ceam, pizza & steak. She's a kid I guess (maybe not the steak part. She can't get enough of the tri-tip we BBQ).
Gracie & Miss Rose had dentist appointments today. Apparently we need to devote an hour each night to dental care. Miss Rose STILL isn't brushing well or long enough. And she needs to floss more. And she HAS to brush every morning. Gracie has very tight teeth, so flossing is crucial for her--something we hadn't started yet. Miss Rose uses a flouride rinse each night, and until Gracie can learn to swish & not swallow we have to brush some of the liquid on her teeth. I'm starting to think our diet isn't as balanced as I'd like to think it is. Or I'm a delinquent parent in this area.
But this....
Makes me smile. A lot. I am blessed.
(shout out to @Esined615 for being obsessed with taking photos of my kids--it really works in my benefit, and to HJ for playing around with it! My friends rock.)
Speaking of running, that's pretty much what I've been doing all day. We fell way behind in housework this week. I say "we" because Bean is a huge contributor to household work. In fact, further solidifying his nomination for husband of the year, twice this week I have gone for a run when Bean got home from work, while he started dinner. I tell ya, he rocks. I'm on par for 19 miles this week, just 1 mile shy of this week's training schedule.
I really thought as Lily got older, the whole working mom with young kids thing would get easier. It's not. Now I have a baby becoming a toddler who has a lot of opinions and can express her needs and loudly if necessary. And a feisty 3yr old. And an intense 6yr old. It may be different than having a baby, but it's definitely not easier. I'm still coming to terms with this.
I'm proud of all I got accomplished today. When I've just busted my tail at work for 4 days, it can be hard to do the same at home. But it's gotta be done. I got sheets changed on all the beds and have done boatloads of laundry and sorted a lot of clothes. Getting out the fall stuff, even though it's still warm. Usually we don't need our warmer clothes until late October or November.
Bean went to Open House at Miss Rose's school tonight. I guess she cried for quite a while on the first day of school. We knew she was crying when we left (same as last year) but staying longer would have only made it worse. I guess I'm glad I'm just now finding out that it lasted a while. She only cried that first day. In reviewing some classwork sent home, Miss Rose had to draw and label her favorite foods. They were: donuts, mac&cheese, ice ceam, pizza & steak. She's a kid I guess (maybe not the steak part. She can't get enough of the tri-tip we BBQ).
Gracie & Miss Rose had dentist appointments today. Apparently we need to devote an hour each night to dental care. Miss Rose STILL isn't brushing well or long enough. And she needs to floss more. And she HAS to brush every morning. Gracie has very tight teeth, so flossing is crucial for her--something we hadn't started yet. Miss Rose uses a flouride rinse each night, and until Gracie can learn to swish & not swallow we have to brush some of the liquid on her teeth. I'm starting to think our diet isn't as balanced as I'd like to think it is. Or I'm a delinquent parent in this area.
But this....
(shout out to @Esined615 for being obsessed with taking photos of my kids--it really works in my benefit, and to HJ for playing around with it! My friends rock.)
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
hi-ya!
I took Miss Rose to Karate for the first time tonight. I've been wanting to take her for over a year now, but it just never seemed to work into our schedule...or I didn't make it work into the schedule. But since she didn't want to play soccer this Fall, I thought it was a good time to try it out. Our church has a completely amazing free karate program. It's super legit and they have over 100 people coming (many of whom are from the community) coming twice a week.
Miss Rose has a pretty strong Type A personality. She loves plans and routines and she thrives with them. Karate seemed like a good fit for those tendancies. Plus, the control and discipline required in martial are great for kids to learn. And Miss Rose is very athletic and needs an outlet for energy.
It was just our first week, but Miss Rose loved it! And she seemed to pick up on some skills pretty quickly. I didn't watch the entire instruction time, but she came home with several moves already that weren't sloppy, but seemed controlled. We'll wait several weeks before we invest in the Gi to make sure she wants to continue her involvement.
Miss Rose is often rather ambivalent about various activities and experiences. It was neat to see her engaged and animated tonight. I really do hope this sticks.
Miss Rose has a pretty strong Type A personality. She loves plans and routines and she thrives with them. Karate seemed like a good fit for those tendancies. Plus, the control and discipline required in martial are great for kids to learn. And Miss Rose is very athletic and needs an outlet for energy.
It was just our first week, but Miss Rose loved it! And she seemed to pick up on some skills pretty quickly. I didn't watch the entire instruction time, but she came home with several moves already that weren't sloppy, but seemed controlled. We'll wait several weeks before we invest in the Gi to make sure she wants to continue her involvement.
Miss Rose is often rather ambivalent about various activities and experiences. It was neat to see her engaged and animated tonight. I really do hope this sticks.
Monday, September 13, 2010
sweet memories
I came home later in the evening a few weeks ago to a partially built a storage unit for the girls' room {which by the way I LOVE} and Lily sitting on Bean's lap on the couch. The assembly required mostly hammering, which kept waking her up. Apparently the older girls had some difficulty going to sleep as well. But Bean was determined to finish the project. I cuddled Lily, then laid her down again.
The assembly continued, and so did Lily's crying. Bean was very close to being done, so I just got her up for the remainder of the time. Bean had asked me to make chocolate chip cookies earlier, so I figured Lily and I would just get started on it.
Can you see in her eyes that she is so tired, and she's been crying? The Kitchen Aid Mixer, a gift from our wedding party 9 years ago. An amazing gift that I've used so much. Measuring cups & spoons also from our wedding. I think maybe they'll last another 10 years.
{don't ya just LOVE the hardware on the cabinets? someday we'll change them}
Look Mom! Your new trick of using mini chocolate chips is great. The perfect amount of chocolate in every bite. (a wonderful friend must have suggested this to you! she sometimes reads your blog and needs to know that her recipe is a new family favorite)
{is there anything more precious than a baby in a white onsie? I don't know why, but I'm a sucker for it! Lily is nearing the end of her onsie days, which makes me a bit sad}
Sure, why not. I'll just eat the whole bite.
I love when I just embrace the moment. I'm not always good at that. I easily get stuck in my routines and my rules. But this night, I threw them out and baked some cookies with my baby at 9pm. It's a wonderful memory I now have, and can share photos of with her in years to come.
Oh, she is so sweet.
It gives me butterflies in my tummy and my heart aches I love her so much. I am definitely not ready for her to lose her baby-ness. She is my lover-girl. She often thinks we are still attached by an umbilical cord and would like to climb back in my uterus. Which sometimes drives me crazy. But mostly, I just hold her and carry her. Because before I know it, those days will be over.
I just might go pick her up and cuddle her before I go to bed tonight.
The assembly continued, and so did Lily's crying. Bean was very close to being done, so I just got her up for the remainder of the time. Bean had asked me to make chocolate chip cookies earlier, so I figured Lily and I would just get started on it.
{don't ya just LOVE the hardware on the cabinets? someday we'll change them}
Look Mom! Your new trick of using mini chocolate chips is great. The perfect amount of chocolate in every bite. (a wonderful friend must have suggested this to you! she sometimes reads your blog and needs to know that her recipe is a new family favorite)
Sure, why not. I'll just eat the whole bite.
I love when I just embrace the moment. I'm not always good at that. I easily get stuck in my routines and my rules. But this night, I threw them out and baked some cookies with my baby at 9pm. It's a wonderful memory I now have, and can share photos of with her in years to come.
Oh, she is so sweet.
It gives me butterflies in my tummy and my heart aches I love her so much. I am definitely not ready for her to lose her baby-ness. She is my lover-girl. She often thinks we are still attached by an umbilical cord and would like to climb back in my uterus. Which sometimes drives me crazy. But mostly, I just hold her and carry her. Because before I know it, those days will be over.
I just might go pick her up and cuddle her before I go to bed tonight.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
spoken word::the tension is good
From the Catalyst 2010 brochure. Written by Ameena Brown. If you haven't seen any of her videos, you need to.
We don't lead from
the safety of the fringe,
We take up residence
in the fray.
Where change is happening,
Where change is necessary.
There we find ourselves
in a unique tug-of-war
between what was,
what is, and what could be
We are faced with
the reality that we were
the catalyst in the moment.
A tension ensues between
our ambitions and our fears.
We are tempted to bail on our goals
but discover
that under pressure
our vision becomes
remarkably crystallized.
A hundred voices
attempt to sway us
and we find we must
lean into God with
a faith deeper than we have ever known.
Change happens
in the very place
where many leaders
flinch, fear, and fail.
The tension we resist
is actually by design,
It tests us, it tries us,
It conforms us to His image.
The tension is necessary,
The tension makes us strong,
The tension is good.
Where is the tension in your life right now?
We don't lead from
the safety of the fringe,
We take up residence
in the fray.
Where change is happening,
Where change is necessary.
There we find ourselves
in a unique tug-of-war
between what was,
what is, and what could be
We are faced with
the reality that we were
the catalyst in the moment.
A tension ensues between
our ambitions and our fears.
We are tempted to bail on our goals
but discover
that under pressure
our vision becomes
remarkably crystallized.
A hundred voices
attempt to sway us
and we find we must
lean into God with
a faith deeper than we have ever known.
Change happens
in the very place
where many leaders
flinch, fear, and fail.
The tension we resist
is actually by design,
It tests us, it tries us,
It conforms us to His image.
The tension is necessary,
The tension makes us strong,
The tension is good.
Where is the tension in your life right now?
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Fit Friday:Fitting it in
My sister and I say that we should get paid to work out. We love to exercise, especially running. I have tons of "dream" jobs. Well, they probably wouldn't be well-paying jobs. Hence why they aren't my job, but things I really enjoy doing that I could do a lot more of. You know, like taking care of my kids. If only I could be my own nanny. But, I digress.
Unfortunately, I am not paid to run or exercise. Which means that I have to fit it into the midst of a full life. I am of the mindset that whatever your life holds, fills it. My life is full with three kids and an almost full-time job. Your life is probably as full being home with your two kids. Or, fill in the blank with what fills your life.
Unless you are paid to exercise, you have to fit it in. Unless you have been an avid athlete your whole life, you most likely have to work at being active. It's not your default. I'm right there with you. I do love to exercise, particularly run. And there are some weeks that I do it quite a lot. But there are other weeks I don't.
Yes, making fitness a priority is key. Scheduling it into your life is important. But it is optional. Feeding and bathing my children, keeping their laundry clean and working for a paycheck are not optional. So, sometimes exercise has to go.
Each week is different for me. I am learning to love running in the morning. I don't love getting up early. But I do like starting off the day burning a few hundred calories and as the day goes on, knowing I don't have to figure out when to run.
Here's how I fit it in.
I run early 2-3x a week. I run early at least one morning that I go to work. Which means setting the alarm for 5:30am in order to run for 30-40 minutes and be back in the house to shower, get ready and finish getting the kids ready.
I have an amazing husband who loves getting up early. I'm more of a "get up with enough time to get ready+5 minutes." Bean will get ready and sit on the couch for 15 minutes in the dark before needing to leave for work. He typically gets Miss Rose up and gets her started on getting ready for school. This is super helpful to me and helps me have the time to run.
Right now, training for a half marathon, my long runs are on Saturdays for the next 10 weeks. This Saturday, Bean has to leave a little after 8am. So I'll be getting up at 6am (again, the waking stinks but the finishing is awesome). I'll probably run 3-4 miles on the treadmill until it's lighter and there is enough neighborhood activity for me to feel comfortable on the streets and I'll do the rest of my run in the neighbornood. Yeah, I have to run 8 miles. Did I mention that?
A few runs I'll do later in the day after Bean gets home, or on my way home from work, or sometimes after dinner. Today I ran on the treadmill in the garage at 2:30pm. The little girls went down for late naps after we picked Miss Rose up from school. Miss Rose had some down time watching TV after school while I ran. It was my best option for how the day was turning out. And I got it done.
I'm really slacking on cross-training and strength training right now. I would love to get up another morning or two a week to do a DVD or other fitness routine. I can tell that focusing on my core would help with running.
There are days that I don't want to run, or can't and so I do a DVD like 30 Day Shred or Banish Fat Boost Metabolism. I also like finding short routines on Exercise TV to fit in. When I remember, I'll do core work in the evening while Bean & I relax before bed.
If you are a {married} mom, whether you work or not, having a supportive husband is crucial to fitting in exercise. Long ago, Bean recognized that running makes me a happier person. He is often the one to push me out the door, even when I'm worried the kids are going to drive him crazy or when I'm feeling guilty for being at work all day and leaving the kids for another 30 minutes.
The bottom line: you will have to fit it in. Enter your goals into your calendar for the week. Develop a tentative plan, but be flexible because you never know when sick or non-sleeping children will mess up a plan. Get creative. I've had my kids play in the driveway while I run on the treadmill. I also will do a DVD with them playing around me. If you have a jogging stroller, yeah it's heavy and you might have to stop a time or two--but getting a few miles in feels so great.
Training re-cap: First week!
Monday: Labor day. Intended to run, but our activities stretched longer than anticipated, so I just skipped it.
Tuesday: 1st day of school. Woke at 5:30am and got in 3.36 miles
Wednesday: Rest
Thursday: 1 mile warm up, 3 miles @ 8:54, .5 mile cool down, total: 4.5 miles
Friday: Plan to do arms & abs in the morning
Saturday: 8 miles (the longest training run I've done ever)
Sunday: Rest or strength training
I missed 1 run (4 miles) but I did my tempo run today and will do my long run Saturday. I'm happy with how this first week of training is going. Last Saturday I ran 7 miles to gear myself up for this week's 8 miles. My route had some good hills which was a good challenge. My pace ended up eing 10:06.
I was supposed to run 10:30 pace, but I guess faster is better than slower. But...to get my ultimate race time, I will need to run 9 minute miles for the entire half. I could probably do it on the treadmill, but transferring that to the street will be interesting. Hopefully my training will work the way its supposed to.
Thanks for tuning in to Fit Friday! Sometimes it's kind of rambling, but I hope you find a bit of inspiration, encouragement--but with a sense of reality :)
How do you fit it in?
Unfortunately, I am not paid to run or exercise. Which means that I have to fit it into the midst of a full life. I am of the mindset that whatever your life holds, fills it. My life is full with three kids and an almost full-time job. Your life is probably as full being home with your two kids. Or, fill in the blank with what fills your life.
Unless you are paid to exercise, you have to fit it in. Unless you have been an avid athlete your whole life, you most likely have to work at being active. It's not your default. I'm right there with you. I do love to exercise, particularly run. And there are some weeks that I do it quite a lot. But there are other weeks I don't.
Yes, making fitness a priority is key. Scheduling it into your life is important. But it is optional. Feeding and bathing my children, keeping their laundry clean and working for a paycheck are not optional. So, sometimes exercise has to go.
Each week is different for me. I am learning to love running in the morning. I don't love getting up early. But I do like starting off the day burning a few hundred calories and as the day goes on, knowing I don't have to figure out when to run.
Here's how I fit it in.
I run early 2-3x a week. I run early at least one morning that I go to work. Which means setting the alarm for 5:30am in order to run for 30-40 minutes and be back in the house to shower, get ready and finish getting the kids ready.
I have an amazing husband who loves getting up early. I'm more of a "get up with enough time to get ready+5 minutes." Bean will get ready and sit on the couch for 15 minutes in the dark before needing to leave for work. He typically gets Miss Rose up and gets her started on getting ready for school. This is super helpful to me and helps me have the time to run.
Right now, training for a half marathon, my long runs are on Saturdays for the next 10 weeks. This Saturday, Bean has to leave a little after 8am. So I'll be getting up at 6am (again, the waking stinks but the finishing is awesome). I'll probably run 3-4 miles on the treadmill until it's lighter and there is enough neighborhood activity for me to feel comfortable on the streets and I'll do the rest of my run in the neighbornood. Yeah, I have to run 8 miles. Did I mention that?
A few runs I'll do later in the day after Bean gets home, or on my way home from work, or sometimes after dinner. Today I ran on the treadmill in the garage at 2:30pm. The little girls went down for late naps after we picked Miss Rose up from school. Miss Rose had some down time watching TV after school while I ran. It was my best option for how the day was turning out. And I got it done.
I'm really slacking on cross-training and strength training right now. I would love to get up another morning or two a week to do a DVD or other fitness routine. I can tell that focusing on my core would help with running.
There are days that I don't want to run, or can't and so I do a DVD like 30 Day Shred or Banish Fat Boost Metabolism. I also like finding short routines on Exercise TV to fit in. When I remember, I'll do core work in the evening while Bean & I relax before bed.
If you are a {married} mom, whether you work or not, having a supportive husband is crucial to fitting in exercise. Long ago, Bean recognized that running makes me a happier person. He is often the one to push me out the door, even when I'm worried the kids are going to drive him crazy or when I'm feeling guilty for being at work all day and leaving the kids for another 30 minutes.
The bottom line: you will have to fit it in. Enter your goals into your calendar for the week. Develop a tentative plan, but be flexible because you never know when sick or non-sleeping children will mess up a plan. Get creative. I've had my kids play in the driveway while I run on the treadmill. I also will do a DVD with them playing around me. If you have a jogging stroller, yeah it's heavy and you might have to stop a time or two--but getting a few miles in feels so great.
Training re-cap: First week!
Monday: Labor day. Intended to run, but our activities stretched longer than anticipated, so I just skipped it.
Tuesday: 1st day of school. Woke at 5:30am and got in 3.36 miles
Wednesday: Rest
Thursday: 1 mile warm up, 3 miles @ 8:54, .5 mile cool down, total: 4.5 miles
Friday: Plan to do arms & abs in the morning
Saturday: 8 miles (the longest training run I've done ever)
Sunday: Rest or strength training
I missed 1 run (4 miles) but I did my tempo run today and will do my long run Saturday. I'm happy with how this first week of training is going. Last Saturday I ran 7 miles to gear myself up for this week's 8 miles. My route had some good hills which was a good challenge. My pace ended up eing 10:06.
I was supposed to run 10:30 pace, but I guess faster is better than slower. But...to get my ultimate race time, I will need to run 9 minute miles for the entire half. I could probably do it on the treadmill, but transferring that to the street will be interesting. Hopefully my training will work the way its supposed to.
Thanks for tuning in to Fit Friday! Sometimes it's kind of rambling, but I hope you find a bit of inspiration, encouragement--but with a sense of reality :)
How do you fit it in?
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