Wordless Wednesday {kinda}

She would wear this dress every day if I let her. The top is actually a bit small, but she is slim enough to make it work.

It was a hand me down that I knew instantly she would love. And she does.

My Gracie girl.

Lipgloss is a big deal to her too.

Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

groundhog minute

It was one of those days.  Nothing particularly wrong with it.  No big catastrophe or incident.

Just one of those days that something small happens..and then something else...and then something else. Kids not listening, baby crying, kids being feisty, mama being weary, daddy longing for a day of football from the couch.  You know.

My sister-in-law put a status on Facebook the other day about every day feeling like Groundhog Day.  When you are a mom of young kids--it definitely does.  Some days, I think it's more like Groundhog Minute.

As in, how many times do I need to tell Lily to sit down in the bath?  Cause I do it once a minute.

And how many times do I need to tell Gracie to sit up in the bath instead of laying down, taking up all the space and basically sprawling her ladyparts right in front of Lily.  Yes, I went there.  Or telling her to quit sticking her booty in the air, shaking it at Lily and laughing because Lily was slapping it.  Yes, it happened.  Tonight.

I told Miss Rose to go get her jammies on after her shower.  5 minutes later she comes sliding in to the bathroom (I'm sure I was in the midst of saying one of the above things) in her underware, a terrycloth headband on her head and large thick black glasses frames.  Kinda like when Kramer is an underwear model on Seinfeld.

Sure it was funny, and I laughed.  But then she went off---not in the direction of her room--where her jammies were.  And when I called out, she got annoyed with me.  And claimed she didn't remember what she was supposed to be doing.  REALLY!?  FOR THE LOVE.

Oh, did I mention how Lily peed on the floor and then slipped in it and fell, in the 45 seconds it took me to throw her poopy diaper away?  She was going in the bath next, and usually a minute or two of nakedness doesn't have a catastrophic end.

And then...and then...and then.

Thankfully, we had the kids bathed--and then did a whole house clean up--and all the oral hygiene routines completed.  Speaking of oral hygiene routines...it's a serious production around here.  Making sure there is 2 full minutes of brushing, and the flossing and the flouride rinse.  We recently gained a second functional bathroom, which makes these routines much easier.  Because Gracie stands on a stool, while Lily tries to climb on it as well.  So the fact that Miss Rose can do her stuff in the other bathroom is amazing.

I'm really glad we are starting the week off with a relatively clean home (even the shoe basket is emptied!) and the kids laundry is clean.

We ended the night with Miss Rose reading to Bean while I played babies with Gracie.  (I was "Abuela" from Dora).  Lily flits back and forth between us.

It was a good ending to the day.

I've got a secret

Psssst....

"Hey Lily, did you know we are the babies of our families?  That means we are going to get away with everything!  Just wait, when I start walking, we'll start getting into lots of trouble together.  But they'll just blame it on our siblings.  All we have to do is smile and look cute.  It's gonna be so much fun!"

Fit Friday: where I get philsophical about running & life

I missed Wednesday's run.  Since I started my half-marathon training about 3 weeks ago, I've done pretty well at sticking to it.  But Tuesday night Lily was up and down all night teething with a cold.  When my alarm went off at 5:30am, it just wasn't worth it.

So instead of the easy 4-miler scheduled for Thursday, I decided to do Wednesday's run.  Mostly because the more I can sweat and the more challenged I am, the happier I am with my run.  It's a little bit warped, I know.  Wednesday's run called for 3 miles at a 9:09 pace with a mile warm-up and a mile cool-down.

Attempting that with a double jogger was daunting, so I settled on the treadmill during Lily's morning nap.  Gracie is pretty much the most awesome kid because she loves to play by herself.  She settled in next to the treadmill in the garage in a kids rocking chair, next to her new plush pony and a few small toys.  She was perfectly happy being near me, and using imaginative play.  I tell ya--she spoils me.  {But I like to think it's only fair b/c Miss Rose requires a song and dance for entertainment.}

I haven't tired any crazy 7-minute miles or anything.  But it seems that I'm able to pump out whatever speed training my schedule calls for.  Last week it was two miles at 8:25 with a break inbetween.  For a girl who started out with over 12-min miles, that's pretty good.

The key though, is the treadmill.  If the mill is turning, my feet are treading.  I can keep going until it's time to stop.  What I'm afraid of though, is not being able to perform like that on the street.  I need to do some speed training on the road or the track.  It's hard to fit into my schedule, so it hasn't happened yet.

As often does, I started waxing philosophical while running.  My running parallels my life.  Whatever life throws at me, I can handle.  Whatever my job calls for, I will get done.  It may be last minute, it may stress me out, but I'll get it done.  When family life and duties pile up, when the balance of career with motherhood is overwhelming, I just get through it.  Because I have to.  Because life doesn't stop.  Just like the treadmill doesn't stop.

When life slows down a little, when a day isn't jam-packed with "must-do's" I don't push myself much.  Like today.  The only thing I "had" to do was meet a friend in the late morning.  I chose to run, and I chose to bring the kids to the park in the afternoon.  I also chose not to do much cleaning in the house.  I chose to let the dishes sit and pile in the sink.  I chose to ignore the piles and chores.  Because I didn't HAVE to do them.  The treadmill of life wasn't running at break-neck speed.

I need to find more of balance.  In my running and in life.  I need to learn how to push myself harder while road-running.  If I can do it on the treadmill, I should be able to do it on the street.

I need to find a balance in daily life.  Perhaps the crazy days wouldn't be so crazy if I stayed caught up on the down days.  Surely I can have an easier day that still involves some cleaning and maintaining.  I keep intending to create a cleaning schedule for floors and bathrooms.  It's not easy for me though.  It doesn't come naturally for some reason.  It's like its all or nothing.

I like Fridays.  Because with my long run coming up on Saturday, I need the rest day.  But tomorrow, I'm going to focus more on catching up with life, while I enjoy a rest day from exercise.

In the end, I run for myself, not for a certain time or achievement--although I do have goals I work towards.  In the end, my sanity and my family are way more important that a sinkful of dishes (although Bean may disagree) or piles of toys.

Saturday I am supposed to run 9 miles, and we have to be somewhere by 9am.  I will probably be on the treadmill before 6am.  I suppose I could run later in the day, but it sure is nice to get it done in the morning.

Happy running & exercising my friends!

And...if you like black beans, brown rice & cilantro, please check out this recipe.  It's my new favorite.  Especially with some salsa and diced avocado.  One recipe makes 3-4 servings and it reheats great.  Easy, healthy and filling!

Wordless Wednesday

already behind

I am trying SO.HARD to find joy in the journey.  That's been my inner mantra this past week.  I'm having a few weeks (and probably a few yet to come) where I feel behind before I've even started.  I'm getting what I need done, but at the cost of a bit of my sanity.  It's the homefront, the workfront, the lifefront.  It's just full.

Joy in the journey.  So many around me are experiencing great heartbreak.  A 4-month old baby recently diagnosed with a brain disorder.  Much is yet unknown about her prognosis, but it seems without a miracle, her development will be severely impaired.  A 36-year old mom of three, with aggressive breast cancer looking at at least one year of intense treatment.

May day to day struggles pale in comparison to these journeys. 

Yet I struggle.  I want to focus on the positives.  I want to recognize the blessings.  I want to look at the big picture.  And I do.  I do all of these things.  Yet still I feel weighed down.  Overwhelmed.  Stuck.  Bleak.

I trust.  I trust in my Lord.  I trust in His plan.  I trust in His Word. 

I say, why so downcast O my soul.  Put your trust in the Lord.  Hide me in the shadow of your wings.  (Psalm 17:8, Psalm 43:5)

One day at a time.  One task at a time.  One moment at a time when necessary.

I soak in the affection of my daughters.  I bask in the love my of my husband.  I drown in the grace of my Savior.

I may already be behind this week, but I'm going to try again.  To seek after hope.  To find joy in the journey.

running through my head

In light of all the running I'm doing these days, I thought that was a pretty catchy title for a "stream of consciousness" blog! 

Speaking of running, that's pretty much what I've been doing all day.  We fell way behind in housework this week.  I say "we" because Bean is a huge contributor to household work.  In fact, further solidifying his nomination for husband of the year, twice this week I have gone for a run when Bean got home from work, while he started dinner.  I tell ya, he rocks.  I'm on par for 19 miles this week, just 1 mile shy of this week's training schedule.

I really thought as Lily got older, the whole working mom with young kids thing would get easier.  It's not.  Now I have a baby becoming a toddler who has a lot of opinions and can express her needs and loudly if necessary.  And a feisty 3yr old.  And an intense 6yr old.  It may be different than having a baby, but it's definitely not easier.  I'm still coming to terms with this.

I'm proud of all I got accomplished today.  When I've just busted my tail at work for 4 days, it can be hard to do the same at home.  But it's gotta be done.  I got sheets changed on all the beds and have done boatloads of laundry and sorted a lot of clothes.  Getting out the fall stuff, even though it's still warm.  Usually we don't need our warmer clothes until late October or November.

Bean went to Open House at Miss Rose's school tonight.  I guess she cried for quite a while on the first day of school.  We knew she was crying when we left (same as last year) but staying longer would have only made it worse.  I guess I'm glad I'm just now finding out that it lasted a while.  She only cried that first day.  In reviewing some classwork sent home, Miss Rose had to draw and label her favorite foods.  They were: donuts, mac&cheese, ice ceam, pizza & steak.  She's a kid I guess (maybe not the steak part.  She can't get enough of the tri-tip we BBQ).

Gracie & Miss Rose had dentist appointments today.  Apparently we need to devote an hour each night to dental care.  Miss Rose STILL isn't brushing well or long enough.  And she needs to floss more.  And she HAS to brush every morning.  Gracie has very tight teeth, so flossing is crucial for her--something we hadn't started yet.  Miss Rose uses a flouride rinse each night, and until Gracie can learn to swish & not swallow we have to brush some of the liquid on her teeth.  I'm starting to think our diet isn't as balanced as I'd like to think it is.  Or I'm a delinquent parent in this area. 

But this....

Makes me smile.  A lot.  I am blessed.

(shout out to @Esined615 for being obsessed with taking photos of my kids--it really works in my benefit, and to HJ for playing around with it!  My friends rock.)

hi-ya!

I took Miss Rose to Karate for the first time tonight.  I've been wanting to take her for over a year now, but it just never seemed to work into our schedule...or I didn't make it work into the schedule.  But since she didn't want to play soccer this Fall, I thought it was a good time to try it out. Our church has a completely amazing free karate program.  It's super legit and they have over 100 people coming (many of whom are from the community) coming twice a week.

Miss Rose has a pretty strong Type A personality.  She loves plans and routines and she thrives with them.  Karate seemed like a good fit for those tendancies.  Plus, the control and discipline required in martial are great for kids to learn. And Miss Rose is very athletic and needs an outlet for energy.

It was just our first week, but Miss Rose loved it!  And she seemed to pick up on some skills pretty quickly.  I didn't watch the entire instruction time, but she came home with several moves already that weren't sloppy, but seemed controlled.  We'll wait several weeks before we invest in the Gi to make sure she wants to continue her involvement. 

Miss Rose is often rather ambivalent about various activities and experiences.  It was neat to see her engaged and animated tonight.  I really do hope this sticks.

sweet memories

I came home later in the evening a few weeks ago to a partially built a storage unit for the girls' room {which by the way I LOVE} and Lily sitting on Bean's lap on the couch.  The assembly required mostly hammering, which kept waking her up.  Apparently the older girls had some difficulty going to sleep as well.  But Bean was determined to finish the project.  I cuddled Lily, then laid her down again.

The assembly continued, and so did Lily's crying.  Bean was very close to being done, so I just got her up for the remainder of the time.  Bean had asked me to make chocolate chip cookies earlier, so I figured Lily and I would just get started on it.

Can you see in her eyes that she is so tired, and she's been crying?  The Kitchen Aid Mixer, a gift from our wedding party 9 years ago.  An amazing gift that I've used so much.  Measuring cups & spoons also from our wedding.  I think maybe they'll last another 10 years.
{don't ya just LOVE the hardware on the cabinets?  someday we'll change them}


Look Mom!  Your new trick of using mini chocolate chips is great.  The perfect amount of chocolate in every bite.  (a wonderful friend must have suggested this to you!  she sometimes reads your blog and needs to know that her recipe is a new family favorite)

{is there anything more precious than a baby in a white onsie?  I don't know why, but I'm a sucker for it!  Lily is nearing the end of her onsie days, which makes me a bit sad}

Sure, why not.  I'll just eat the whole bite.

I love when I just embrace the moment.  I'm not always good at that.  I easily get stuck in my routines and my rules.  But this night, I threw them out and baked some cookies with my baby at 9pm.  It's a wonderful memory I now have, and can share photos of with her in years to come.

Oh, she is so sweet. 

It gives me butterflies in my tummy and my heart aches I love her so much.  I am definitely not ready for her to lose her baby-ness.  She is my lover-girl.  She often thinks we are still attached by an umbilical cord and would like to climb back in my uterus.  Which sometimes drives me crazy.  But mostly, I just hold her and carry her.  Because before I know it, those days will be over.

I just might go pick her up and cuddle her before I go to bed tonight.

spoken word::the tension is good

From the Catalyst 2010 brochure.  Written by Ameena Brown.  If you haven't seen any of her videos, you need to.

We don't lead from
the safety of the fringe,
We take up residence
in the fray.

Where change is happening,
Where change is necessary.

There we find ourselves
in a unique tug-of-war
between what was,
what is, and what could be

We are faced with
the reality that we were
the catalyst in the moment.

A tension ensues between
our ambitions and our fears.

We are tempted to bail on our goals
but discover
that under pressure
our vision becomes
remarkably crystallized.

A hundred voices
attempt to sway us

and we find we must
lean into God with
a faith deeper than we have ever known.

Change happens
in the very place
where many leaders
flinch, fear, and fail.

The tension we resist
is actually by design,
It tests us, it tries us,
It conforms us to His image.

The tension is necessary,
The tension makes us strong,
The tension is good.

Where is the tension in your life right now?

Fit Friday:Fitting it in

My sister and I say that we should get paid to work out.  We love to exercise, especially running.  I have tons of "dream" jobs.  Well, they probably wouldn't be well-paying jobs.  Hence why they aren't my job, but things I really enjoy doing that I could do a lot more of.  You know, like taking care of my kids.  If only I could be my own nanny.  But, I digress.

Unfortunately, I am not paid to run or exercise.  Which means that I have to fit it into the midst of a full life.  I am of the mindset that whatever your life holds, fills it.  My life is full with three kids and an almost full-time job.  Your life is probably as full being home with your two kids.  Or, fill in the blank with what fills your life.

Unless you are paid to exercise, you have to fit it in.  Unless you have been an avid athlete your whole life, you most likely have to work at being active.  It's not your default.  I'm right there with you.  I do love to exercise, particularly run.  And there are some weeks that I do it quite a lot.  But there are other weeks I don't.

Yes, making fitness a priority is key.  Scheduling it into your life is important.  But it is optional.  Feeding and bathing my children, keeping their laundry clean and working for a paycheck are not optional.  So, sometimes exercise has to go.

Each week is different for me.  I am learning to love running in the morning.  I don't love getting up early.  But I do like starting off the day burning a few hundred calories and as the day goes on, knowing I don't have to figure out when to run.

Here's how I fit it in.

I run early 2-3x a week.  I run early at least one morning that I go to work.  Which means setting the alarm for 5:30am in order to run for 30-40 minutes and be back in the house to shower, get ready and finish getting the kids ready.

I have an amazing husband who loves getting up early.  I'm more of a "get up with enough time to get ready+5 minutes."  Bean will get ready and sit on the couch for 15 minutes in the dark before needing to leave for work.  He typically gets Miss Rose up and gets her started on getting ready for school.  This is super helpful to me and helps me have the time to run.

Right now, training for a half marathon, my long runs are on Saturdays for the next 10 weeks.  This Saturday, Bean has to leave a little after 8am.  So I'll be getting up at 6am (again, the waking stinks but the finishing is awesome).  I'll probably run 3-4 miles on the treadmill until it's lighter and there is enough neighborhood activity for me to feel comfortable on the streets and I'll do the rest of my run in the neighbornood.  Yeah, I have to run 8 miles.  Did I mention that?

A few runs I'll do later in the day after Bean gets home, or on my way home from work, or sometimes after dinner.  Today I ran on the treadmill in the garage at 2:30pm.  The little girls went down for late naps after we picked Miss Rose up from school.  Miss Rose had some down time watching TV after school while I ran.  It was my best option for how the day was turning out.  And I got it done.

I'm really slacking on cross-training and strength training right now.  I would love to get up another morning or two a week to do a DVD or other fitness routine.  I can tell that focusing on my core would help with running. 

There are days that I don't want to run, or can't and so I do a DVD like 30 Day Shred or Banish Fat Boost Metabolism.  I also like finding short routines on Exercise TV to fit in.  When I remember, I'll do core work in the evening while Bean & I relax before bed.

If you are a {married} mom, whether you work or not, having a supportive husband is crucial to fitting in exercise.  Long ago, Bean recognized that running makes me a happier person.  He is often the one to push me out the door, even when I'm worried the kids are going to drive him crazy or when I'm feeling guilty for being at work all day and leaving the kids for another 30 minutes.

The bottom line: you will have to fit it in.  Enter your goals into your calendar for the week.  Develop a tentative plan, but be flexible because you never know when sick or non-sleeping children will mess up a plan.  Get creative.  I've had my kids play in the driveway while I run on the treadmill.  I also will do a DVD with them playing around me.  If you have a jogging stroller, yeah it's heavy and you might have to stop a time or two--but getting a few miles in feels so great.

Training re-cap: First week!
Monday: Labor day.  Intended to run, but our activities stretched longer than anticipated, so I just skipped it.
Tuesday: 1st day of school.  Woke at 5:30am and got in 3.36 miles
Wednesday: Rest
Thursday: 1 mile warm up, 3 miles @ 8:54, .5 mile cool down, total: 4.5 miles
Friday: Plan to do arms & abs in the morning
Saturday: 8 miles (the longest training run I've done ever)
Sunday: Rest or strength training

I missed 1 run (4 miles) but I did my tempo run today and will do my long run Saturday.  I'm happy with how this first week of training is going.  Last Saturday I ran 7 miles to gear myself up for this week's 8 miles.  My route had some good hills which was a good challenge.  My pace ended up eing 10:06. 

I was supposed to run 10:30 pace, but I guess faster is better than slower.  But...to get my ultimate race time, I will need to run 9 minute miles for the entire half.  I could probably do it on the treadmill, but transferring that to the street will be interesting.  Hopefully my training will work the way its supposed to.

Thanks for tuning in to Fit Friday!  Sometimes it's kind of rambling, but I hope you find a bit of inspiration, encouragement--but with a sense of reality :)

How do you fit it in?

The Lord is my shepherd

I've mentioned a few  times how I taught the girls Psalm 23 this summer.

Here is a video I took a few weeks ago of Gracie. She is quite a willing performer.  She actually doesn't need much prompting--most nights she says it all without any help.  We hadn't gotten to the last few lines when I taped this, although now we have completed the chapter and moved on to Psalm 23.

And you'll notice how Lily does not like to be ignored and makes her presence known.  That's pretty much par for the course.  Enjoy!!

It's a girl! And other tidbits

{otherwise known as a long, somewhat rambling blog post because I miss blogging}

No, I haven't been keeping a pregnancy a secret.  And we aren't adopting--a child or a pet.  Although Gracie's fish Minnie died last night. 

However, we had an odd experience the other night.  Bean and I were out to dinner (yay date night) and our server introduced herself.  Her name was Hope.  Later on, Bean told me when she told us her name that he thought to himself that he really liked it.  And if we ever had a 4th daughter, that would be a good name for her.  What's odd (besides the fact that he actually had those thoughts) is I had exactly the same thought.  I have this compulsion with syllables because Miss Rose's name has 4 syllables, Gracie's has 3 and obviously Lily has 2.  So if we ever had a 4th child, it would need a name of 2 or preferrabley just 1 syllable.  My mind is an odd thing.

But, I digress.  {and I will continue to}

Miss Rose has decided to embrace her girly-ness.  Alert the presses.  She's a girl and she wants to show it (in her own way).

When Miss Rose was around 4, she decided she didn't like girl things at all.  She insisted on boy things.  When it was pajama day in her pre-K class, we HAD to buy pajamas in the boy section.  If she deemed something "girl" she didn't want anything to do with it.

Bean and I weren't too concerned about it.  We knew she would grow out of it in her own way and own time.  There were times I insisted on appropriate clothing for certain events, but mostly I let her march to the beat of her own drum.

By the time she started Kindergarten, we had moved on from decidedly "boy" things to more gender neutral, but she was mostly still anti-girl.   One morning walking her into school I actually heard some little girls talking behind us about how Miss Rose doesn't like girly things.  It made me giggle.

And now, we are a big first grader.  Miss Rose has spent a lot of time with our next door neighbor-girl who is about a year older and definately girly.  She has also spent a lot of time this summer with her cousin and of course watching Gracie become uber-girly.

Last year Miss Rose didn't have much of an opinion about her school clothes or materials.  I mistakenly assumed it would be the same this year.  Due to a variety of circumstances, I ended up shopping this weekend without Miss Rose.

I bought some cuffed jean capris.  But she doesn't like cuffs.

I bought a backpack.  But she wanted a messenger bag.

Bean went and found a messenger bag.  But it was blue and green, and she wanted girly colors.

I bought a new re-usable lunch sack.  But it was blue and didn't have a zipper.

Hello opinions.  Opinions I didn't expect.

Bean gets the award for Dad of the Year.  He was so concerned last night about Miss Rose having a good first day of school he scoured the county for a messenger bag for her.  Apparently they are popular, because there were literally none to be found.  Finally at Kohl's he came up with a Hannah Montana and an iCarly bag.  He bought one of each to let her choose.  She chose Hannah of course (we don't watch iCarly).

Me.  I guess I'm the hardnose.  I figured--she'll get over it.  We'll find a bag in a few weeks or order on online.  That's an interesting difference between Bean and I.  We both had childhoods were money was scarce and we didn't have a lot of the perks or even "normals" of childhood.  I honestly did not eat ANY Chinese food until I was 17.  True story.

Anyhow.  My mentality is--I survived, it really wasn't that bad and it made me stronger and it's good to understand life isn't about stuff.  Bean's mentality is--if at all possible I don't want my kids to miss out on things I did and I want to give them everything I can.  Our kids are not spoiled at all---and we say no to plenty of stuff.  Bu the difference in our approaches is quite interesting to me.

Enough with the psychology class.

Miss Rose still is, and probably will always be her own brand of girl.  I am too actually.  I like that about us.  But it's sweet to see her develop this side of her personality and tastes.  If this is how Miss Rose is, I'm petrified of when we reach this stage with Gracie.  She already is so opinionated.  And loves all things frilly, shiny and sparkley.  Watch out world.

And oh my--the competition to talk between these two, especially in the car.  Gracie has actually started saying "Miss Rose be quiet" or "let me talk" because Miss Rose continually interrupts and always adds on to whatever she was saying or asking before.  In another year or two when Lily is carrying on conversations---there is never going to be any silence!

The hardest adjustment for me with the back to school routine is getting up at 5:30am to run in the morning!  I really enjoyed getting up between 6 and 6:15 and ending my run when Bean was leaving.  But now with needing to leave the house at 7:30---with three kids ready for the day---running must happen earlier.  It's just a few days a week though, so I can't complain too much!

Have I mentioned that Miss Rose still is my amazon child?  67lbs and 50.5 inches at 6 1/2 yrs old.  That is above the 90% for both categories.  Doctors always ask where she gets it.  And I have no idea.  Because Bean and I aren't tall.  Well, I do know because we both have tall grandfathers and my dad is 6 feet.  But I just never thought I my daughter would get those genes.  I think Gracie is pretty tall too.  Could it be that all my daughters will be taller than me?  Is it bad that I was kinda glad to see two of the other "larger" kindergarteners from last year are in her class this year so she doesn't feel so big?

I really hope getting back to the school routine will get me back to blogging more.  I miss this space.

Miss Rose wasn't super keen on me taking lots of photos, so I didn't ask her to pose here-I just snapped the shot, and she happened to have an intense look on her face. 

Dad of the year and his girls.  Lily has some crazy morning hair.  She wasn't thrilled about a fast moving morning.  I guess she enjoyed our slower summer mornings too.  I LOVE that Gracie carries dolls around.  This one happens to be from my childhood and it was probably made in the early 70's.  Her name is Lizzie if you are wondering.

I sure love these four.

Fit Friday: Time to get serious

I have run three half marathons. 

In 2006 I ran the OC Half.  I think it was the first or second year of the race.  The course was a bit boring at times, but finishing it was a huge sense of exhilaration and accomplishment.  I had been a mom for two years at that point and it felt incredible to do something like that just for myself.  I don't exactly remember my time.  I think it was between 2:30 & 2:45. 

The furthest I had run prior to the race was 5 miles.  The first half of the race I stuck with a friend and my youngest sister and we did run/walk intervals.  The second half I took off on my own and did more running.  I didn't push myself much because of my lack of training.  I just wanted to finish.

I ran my second half marathon in 2007.  That too was a huge accomplishment for me.  Gracie was just 6 months old.  I road-tripped to San Francisco for the Nike Women's Half with my two sisters and my sister-in-law, who had a 9 month old.  One sister watched the babies while the other three of us raced.  She may have had the harder task that morning!  That race felt awesome--running in San Fran, running some huge hills--all while being a nursing mom to a young baby. I think our time was just around 2:30. 

My third half marathon was just last fall in Long Beach with my "middle" sister.  I trained decently for it, but probably never ran over 7 miles.  My biggest goal was to help my sister keep going and get a good time.  She always has more in her than she thinks she does!  Again my time was around 2:30.

I've yet to run a half though, with full training and just for myself.  I'm registered for my 4th half marathon in November.  My first local race.  I'm looking forward to my hubby and kids waiting for me at the finish line.  The course is pretty straight and flat--great for making a personal record.

Based on some recent run times, I should be able to finish the race in under 2:15.  I think I should be able to get pretty close to 2:00.  So, there you have my realistic and my optimistic goals! 

Mostly though, I just want to train properly.  I have all the tools I need.  A neighborhood I can run in, a double jogger, a treadmill in my garage.  What I sometimes lack is the discipline to wake early to get my runs in.

This summer, I've enjoyed being able to run early before Bean leaves, which was about a 6am wake-up for me.  With school starting next week, we're going to have to leave the house earlier again.  Which means waking at 5:30 some mornings.  It also means waking early on Saturdays for long runs.  When I do it, I'm so happy I did.

The last few weeks I've been slacking a bit, which maybe I needed.  I've been staying up late reading, so even when I set my alarm, I just stay in bed.  That long run on Saturday is the biggest challenge.  It's our only morning home together as a family.  If I get up and run at 6am, I should be done by 8am most weeks.  I just gotta do it!!

I have a couple good training schedules.  The main one I plan to follow begins next Monday, for 10 weeks.  It's time to get serious and log those miles. 

Are you thinking about training for a race?  Here's a great way to personalize your training based on recent runs, how long you want to train for, which day you want to do your long run etc.  The SmartCoach from Runner's World.  I have the app on my iPhone but you can do it on their website as well and have it emailed to you for printing.  I also have a training plan I cut out from a recent Runner's World mag on running a 2hr half marathon. 

I'll report back next week and let you know how my first week of training is going.

Can Psalm 23 help her find her way home?

Miss Rose needed ANOTHER school physical before first grade.  I guess because her last one was when she was 5, before pre-K she was due, even though her pre-K one counted for last year.  I don't understand.  All I know is they told me I needed to turn another form in and I couldn't talk them out of it.

If you recall, that particular appointment was like wrestling a bear.  One and a half years later, I hoped that Miss Rose was more calm, cool and collected and it wouldn't be the ordeal it was before.  I prepared her to have to pee in a cup, the hearing and eye tests and such.  She was a bit hesitant, because that's her.

Let's just say it could have been a lot worse.  I still ended up with pee all over my hands helping her get pee in the cup.  That was just lovely.  Especially while babywearing Lily in the sling to keep her contained.  I'm sure Miss Rose loved peeing in a cup with the audience of her mom and sisters too.

There was a touch and go moment when the doctor questioned whether or not she had recieved her Hepatitis A booster.  We were being seen at a different office than our usual one so they didn't have Miss Rose's complete chart.  Thankfully, the doctor chose to defer to when he could check out her chart.  That was the point Miss Rose stopped clinging to my leg for dear life.

Perhaps my favorite moment of the exam came when the doctor questioned her on our phone number and address.  We haven't really taught her either yet. I suppose we are slackers. 

In my defense, she can now recite the entire 23rd Psalm.  Which I am pretty impressed by.  So if she is ever lost, she can be comforted by reminding herself "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want."  She just won't be able to tell anyone her address or phone number.

Apparently I should have worked on the logical stuff first.  What can I say, I'm a pastor!  She's a pastor's kid.  I'm still pretty proud of her!  After we recite our memory verse tonight, I'll work on our address and phone number with the kids.

on the merry-go-round

Do you ever feel like your life is a merry-go-round that seems to never stop so you can get off?  That's where I'm at right now.  I had a great week with the kids last week, but come Sunday night the "back to work" blues hit, and then a cold turned into a virus with the baby, complete with fever.  That merry-go-round kicked up and off we went.  It seems like it's coming to a stop, but I can't be sure.

I don't like weeks like this.  I don't like feeling this way.  This was not a good re-entry into the working mom life, after a calm, fun week of being a mom.

Due to a variety of things, I completely lost it on Tuesday.  I was intending to go to work, but the wheels flew off of everything and my only option was to stay home.  Not that I was upset to stay home.  When my children are sick, it rips my heart in two to leave them and go to work.  But after being gone for a week, and then my first day back was an off-site planning day, I had work piled up. 

And when I say I lost it, I mean I cried for over an hour.  I would stop, and then start again.  And for me, crying for an hour is the equivalent of the average woman crying for three days straight.  I never cry like that.  But I needed it.  Crying is cleansing and often I wish I could let myself cry more. 

But, in the midst of it all, God is good and when all the wheels fly off your life, he provides people to loan you their spare tires.  Bean has been amazing, staying home two days this week with Lily.  Family stepped in to help out with the older girls these last few days too--and they even brought us a pizza last night.  Someone even did some cleaning at my house.  We have awesome family.  We love being there for them too.

I am hoping, praying, expecting, believing that tomorrow I will get off this merry-go-round and resume normal life and normal emotions.  On Monday, the doctor said to expect three days of fever for Lily.  Tonight completes three days so hopefully tomorrow she will be fever free.

My thought tonight was that I want to find joy in the journey.  Life is a journey.  There are always going to be ups and downs.  But I'm asking God to restore my joy and give me peace in th storm.

I do plan to resume the fun of sharing life with our Three-Bean Circus.  I have so many photos from this summer.

Here's hoping all is well with you!