Sunday, August 19, 2007

Comfort Food

We all have our comfort foods. To some, food is comfort. I'm sure I could do some research and find some great stat's on America's food addiction. Tonight I'm having a moment where I want to use food as comfort. Not because I'm in pain but it's just been a busy day and there's nothing like a frosty Diet Coke or some great ice cream to make me feel better.

But is that really healthy? Definately not physically, and probably not even emotionally or mentally. I'm attempting to give up soda for 30 days. Today is day 4 I think. I was having a small argument with God about it and saying--it's okay if I have one. It's been a rough day, I just need that hit of caffeine and that bubbly going down my throat. But God said, let me be your peace.

I am weak though. I leaned in to take a swig of my husband's beverage, which just happened to be the aforementioned frosty drink. He chastised me and encouraged me to stay strong. So far, I did. Then I began to think about my favorite ice cream we have in the freezer. That would make me feel good. But--I did just eat 2 pieces of cake and the frosting off a 3rd piece at a reception earlier. And a bean burrito. I have another bean burrito, but it's not really sounding good. I am pretty full. But I'd make room for ice ceam.

That's not right. If I'm not hungry for the burrito, I don't need the ice cream.

Comfort food. I want the food that I like to put me in a better place. Hence my lifelong struggle with weight. Not that I've ever been super overweight, but I just always struggle with 10lbs. More like 20 right now from my optimum weight, since I had a baby almost 5 months ago. I don't need food to bring me out of a bad day or a long day.

So I'm going to say strong. I'm not going to eat the ice cream. I'm going to throw away the bean burrito. I'm going to wake up for day 5 of no soda.

Comfort food. Whatever.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

What good does crying do you?

"There's no crying in baseball" is a well known movie line, spouted by Tom Hanks character to his female baseball team.

Why would I choose that for my blog name? Well, those who know me, probably can figure it out. I am an anomaly of the female race. I only cry a handful of times during the course of a year. Now, when I do cry, usually it's a doozy--I cry for all the reasons that I perhaps should have cried in the months previous. This year, because I had pregnancy hormones raging, I'll probably cry more than my requisite few times by the time the calendar shows December.

It's not that I am opposed to crying, it's just that I don't always see what good it does. And maybe I've had too many reasons in my life to cry so my method of coping is not crying. I am definately a "bottler." I hoard my emotions until they overflow. And that overflowing results in one of my crying episodes.

I have many reasons this week to cry. I can't and won't go into them. And I have "almost" cried a few times...but I choke back the tears. Partially because I am afraid to let them get control of me. Afraid of what might happen if I allow the floodgates to open.

I know that crying is healthy and it would be good for me to let the tears flow. But it's not something I can make myself do. My husband is thankful when I don't cry...because he doesn't know what to do when I do. I spoil him by not ever crying!!

I'll let you know when I finally do cry. I'm kind of hoping it will be in the near future. But, only time will tell.

Crying really accomplishes nothing for the situation you cry over...but I'm sure it's good for your emotional health.

God says that those who sow in tears reap job. Maybe I need to sow more in tears so that I can experience more joy.

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