I try to keep a good attitude and not complain much. But sometimes things just stack up that are bugging me. So here are my frustrations as of late...
I'm frustrated!!
...I'm trying to watch what I'm eating, but the scale hasn't changed in more than a week. I guess I'm watching myself eat too much.
...I have issues with sugar. I like it too much. I need to fast it or something, but frankly I'm a nursing mom and I don't want to deprive myself right now. Plus--I'd rather learn self-control that I can use over the course of my life because I realistically will not give sugar up forever.
...My body constantly feels sore. My muscles ache. It's from carrying a baby, nursing a baby, doing dishes 3x a day because we don't have a dishwasher, sleeping with a baby in my bed, not exercising.
...I want to start exercising. I need to exercise. I need the endorphins.
...Some days I feel a bit of the baby blues. It's normal and just my hormones regulating. But me and emotions don't get alone well (which is why I'm the No Crying Mama). Hence why I want to exercise, for the endorphins, which will lift my spirits.
...I'm impatient with myself. I want to just go go go and get things done and continue to accomplish more on our home. There is still much to go through and get rid of and organize. But I'm not even 6 weeks past having a baby, by c-section. My energy levels just aren't back to normal. Which is okay. I just don't like it.
...I'm nervous about returning to work and having three children. I wouldn't change it for the world and I signed up for it. But I don't have to like it. I like my job, but I like my kids more. I want to be a minivan mom and join playgroups and go to the library and volunteer in classrooms and do fun stuff with my kids. It frustrates me that on my days off, I need to rest and recover from the craziness and there is a house to clean, laundry to fold, errands to run.
...Gracie has a hanging cold/cough/congestion--AGAIN. This girl gets sick and stays sick so much. I used to think it was because she was a petite little thing---but she's grown a lot lately and is looking much heartier. If it doesn't start to clear up, it's another $15 co-pay where I'm afraid they'll tell me it's viral and nothing they can do.
...LC has the same cold. Her nose isn't pouring like Gracie's, but poor little baby is cough and phlegmy. But of course she doesn't know how to clear it. She hacks and coughs and chokes and spits up mucous. Hers isn't too bad. But I'm watching her like a hawk to make sure she doesn't get RSV or have compromised breathing.
...I'm frustrated that I'm frustrated!
It will pass. It always does. Hopefully it's theraputic for me to put it out there. For every frustration I have, I can think of ways it could be worse. My problems are nothing compared to what some face on a daily basis. But some days I need to give myself permission to complain. So today, I have.
OBOB
7 years ago
You'll notice a change when the baby hits 4-5 months. Life will get easier and you'll fall into a routine that suits you. Don't worry... you are doing fantastic.
ReplyDeleteI am so there with you! I am having the same kind of day! I am frustrated that Gianna has decided to start waking up at 3am every morning and since I am bottle feeding it takes me at least 30 minutes to feed her. Then it takes me another 30 to go back to sleep. I hate that I wake up a couple times before she does because I am worried I will not hear her wake up.
ReplyDeleteI am so mad that I weigh 30 more pounds than I did in high school and that breastfeeding did not work for me. I know I would have more of this baby weight off had I been able to really breastfeed. My sister had a baby 3 weeks after meet and is back to normal already, has been breastfeeding and chasing a two year old. Loosing weight requires energy and I have none. In my opinion healthy eating takes work and most days I just can't get it together and I eat cereal or quesadillas.
I agree I want to be a minivan, playgroup, stroller stride mom and to think all of this is being said from a mother of one.
All I can say is give your self some grace and be kind to Corrina. It has only been 6 weeks since LC was born so there is no pressure to have the weight gone but I am so understand wanting the endorphins of exercise. Maybe you need your DC back????
These days/feelings are bound to be around right now! Sorry - you will get through it, though the transition is a challenge. Keep on keepin on and you'll get there :) Give yourself time
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