The Yin and the Yang

Can someone please explain why my 4-yr old is obsessed with guns, swords and weapons? Did I mention that my 4-yr old is a GIRL?

Growing up with a brother only 18-months younger than me, I definately played my fair share of "boy" games. Mostly they were just outside games. We played a lot of Indians and Pioneers and war. I remember telling my brother if he would play dolls or house with me for a time, I'd go play outside with him. I was definately a tomboy--but I did like my baby dolls and miniatures. I didn't do the Barbie thing, wasn't super into clothes or my looks (as evidenced by some horrendous pictures of my youth!).

I'm still not that girly...although there was something about meeting and marrying my husband that made me want to be more feminine at times. In high school my friends joked that I was "the man" because I didn't cry at the drop of a hat, didn't exhibit intense emotion of any kind and I always thought anything a guy could do (carry heavy stuff, fix cars) I could do too. And I did!

Apparently I haven't exhibited enough balance to Miss Rose. While she does like her baby dolls (usually at nighttime when she is supposed to be going to sleep) the kid is obsessed with action and all things Transformers, Power Rangers, a multitude of superheroes and martial arts. Mind you---she hasn't SEEN any of this stuff. (well, I did let her see the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles last week!) We are very guarded with what she views and she has a sensitive spirit---so she actually doesn't like super violent stuff.

She just knows what she's learned from boys at daycare and church. She has this whole Transformer routine that's hilarious and involves a lot of wide leg stances, jerky arm movements and a lot of sounds that include spitting. Her 1 year old cousin was copying the moves tonight. It was really cute.

Recently, she has told me she only likes boy things. One of her good friends knows every My Little Pony and accessory. Miss Rose NEVER plays with the ones she has. She loves to watch Jon and Kate Pluss 8--and she's always pretending she's one of the boys or Jon. One day when she was wearing a new shirt she told me I could only say it was "cool" I wasn't allowed to say it was pretty or cute.

Yet she can be so sensitive and sweet. She's great with her little sister and cousins and smaller children. She can be very nurturing. She loves role modeling me in the care of her sister. I hear her saying things to her baby dolls all the time that I say to Gracie. It's very sweet. Miss Rose is very affectionate, always wanting to be sitting on my lap (again, enter mental picture of a big puppy trying to crawl on your small lap) or wanting to be carried (next to impossible for me now--as she's almost 50lbs and over 42 inches).

I know it will all balance out in the end. Whenever I comment on it, my family and close friends just point right back me siting my tomboy status. But seriously--I wasn't obsessed with the stuff like she is. Many Sundays, she's in a pretty dress with her hair all done up--running through the church lobby, doing her Transformer moves or on the floor showing her panties.

It's just the yin and the yang of Miss Rose. I can't wait to see what Miss Gracie's will be! While I don't mind her obsession with boy stuff--I do try to bring balance and remind her that it's okay to like boy stuff, but she is a girl!!

P.S. My smart little miss---she asked me a question about a conversation I had earlier with her grammie. I said I didn't know the specific detail she was asking for. Then she said "do you really not know, or do you just not want to talk to me about it." Smart butt. She was right. But I didn't tell her that!!